


Kitty With The Claw (She's Fluffy!)

by kittenbath



Series: Kitty With A Claw: Chronicles! [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Apparently Your Pee Has Magical Properties, But Chimichangas Aren't Good For You, Don't Tell Bucky, F/M, He Argued With Kids, I Have A Theme Song For You But I Need A Beat First, It Goes Like, Kitty With The Claw, Like Loki That's Enough, Loki Argues With A Kitten, Loki Needs a Hug, Loki Speaks Cat, Meow Meow, Now Kittens, Pietro Maximoff Lives, Pietro Spoils You Anyways, Protective Bucky Barnes, READER IS A KITTEN, SHE'S FLUFFY, Tom Is So Disappointed, You Can Read For Some Reason, You Got A Ton of Kitty Powers, You Like Chimichangas, You Love Piet The Most, fluffy fluffy fluffy, meow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-18
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-05-21 09:37:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 22,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6046801
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kittenbath/pseuds/kittenbath
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Deadpool forgot his pet kitten (AKA, the reader) while trying to break into the SHIELD helicarrier. After tearing apart the main control room in an effort to find chimichangas, Fury decided to keep you, the kitten, in solitary confinement. However, when the Avengers came into play, they argue that, even though you were apparently dangerous, you deserved more of a chance and request to Fury that you be given a chance at the Avengers Initiative-being the first animal to do so...</p><p>It's not going to be easy. Kittens are really fussy and this one's really fluffy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You Were Born

“Are you sure this will work?” the anxious man said, his hands carefully cupping the dark, yellow solution as a sliver of it trickled out onto the dirt below. “Both HYDRA and Weapon X-”

“Have brilliance that is of no significance when compared to mine,” another man stated, his face hidden by the green hood that surrounded his body. As he walked over to the wall, where his notes were taped, his cape billowed behind him. “And if you doubt me again, I will not be as lenient. The material you brought me were items I could find in my refrigerator. Cross my generosity again, and your family will pay the price.”

The other man paled, then turned his head back to the solution, where the last drops of it was slowly absorbed by the dirt. “It’s finished.”

His regal cape whipping behind him, the man rushed over to the pile of dirt on the table, awaiting his results. After a few moments passed, a slight rumble shook the ground of his mansion, furthering his expectation. Both men leaned forward, their eyes focused on a single spot on the dirt that was still quivering.

“Behold, the most terrifying creature this world will ever see,” the man with the armor declared. His companion sharply took in a breath as the dirt was moved, by...something. “With this, I will be able to pronounce myself as ruler of the world!” he exclaimed triumphantly, his excitement pooling over the edge.

“At the end of this day, all will know the name of-”

“Mew?”

Stuttering to a stop, he stared at the being that just arose from the dirt. It stared right back at him with bright blue eyes, then mewed again. The dirt shook again, and before long, almost a dozen little kittens were rolling around the dirt, playing with each other and mewling happily.

“What is this?” he said quietly. When the other man didn’t answer, he slammed his fist against the table, startling one kitten that just popped up, causing her to fall off the table altogether. “WHAT IS THIS?”

You shook your head, a little bit dizzy from the jump down, and was about to mew when you heard a very scary man’s voice. Instead, you decided to cower in the crack between the walls instead.

“I-I’m so sorry, I thought I grabbed the tyrannosaurus teeth. I must have grabbed the sabertooth instead-”

The powerful blast emanating from the top of the table was enough to make you hide your face in between your paws. A second ago, your brothers and sisters were meowing on the dirt, but now, it was silent. You didn’t dare make a sound.

“If you need something done, you must do it yourself, as the saying goes,” the man growled, and your tail began to puff involuntarily. “Of course, it doesn’t hurt to use technology to take care of the dirty work,” he chuckled lowly. You had to resist the urge to mew, otherwise the bad human might hear you, and you’ll end up just like…

Like your brothers and sisters.

Suddenly, a crash sounded through the hall, scaring you further into the crack. The scary man grunted, and his body fell with a thud in front of your hiding place. Tilting your head, you spied him rubbing his own, which had dark liquid flowing from an angry red cut on his forehead. 

“Bombs are so much fun!” a different man’s voice yelled, but he didn’t sound at all threatening. In fact, he sounded pretty happy, and not at all as scared as you were. “Everything’s all quiet in the first second, but then after you throw it, it’s all raining body parts! Like food fights! What do you mean, that’s not mature?” he cried, then paused. “Oh, yeah, you’re right. Then the tacos wouldn’t get to be eaten.”

“Deadpool,” the man said with gritted teeth, slowly making his way up.

“That’s my name,” the other one answered cheerfully. “I’d ask if you wanted my number, but eh, you’re not really my type.” He paused again, then continued, saying, “Do I have a type? Or is that too self-centered or something? Who would I want to go out with?”

“Let me guess. Annoying mercenaries like you?” he asked, his voice dripping with malice.

Apparently, the intruder didn’t pick up on that, because he replied, “No! Of course not! I can’t date myself! What kind of stupid question is-OH MY TACOS!”

The stranger pushed the mean man to the floor, his red feet practically brushing your whiskers. “Dead kittens!”

A shot rang through the air, causing you to whimper just the slightest bit, and a little, metal thing fell to the floor, coated with that dark, red liquid. Silence permeated the air for a second, before the man in front of you turned around. “Rude,” he said haughtily.

The next few seconds, your senses shut down, mostly because those moments seemed to pass at the blink of an eyes. There were a few screams, a few laughs, and a few shouts of, “TACOS!” You couldn’t see what was happening because you had decided to hide your face into your paws once again, cowering in instinctive fear. 

Finally, the sounds ceased, and all that was left was the sound of metal being sheathed, and the footfalls that were...quickly approaching you…

“Mew!” you yelped, forgetting that he could most likely hear you, and before you knew it, you were being lifted up, out of the crack, into the air, and onto the grip of a man wearing a red and black suit, who was grinning widely. 

“Well, well, well,” he said, leaning closer to get a better look at you. “Looks like you managed to hide real good, huh?” He paused again, tilting his head as if he was listening to something in his ear. “What do you mean, she looks scared? I’m not scary!”

“Meow,” you said, still attempting to hide your tiny face. In response, he placed you gently on the table, where you were able to spot a few red marks on your fluffy fur that definitely weren’t there the second before. “Mew,” you complained, poking the stains in an attempt to get them off.

“Sorry about that,” he said in a sing-songy voice, patting your head. 

“Mew,” you grumbled.

“I said I was sorry!” he exclaimed. “Anyways, the reason I’m here is ‘cause you know the guy that was just here?”

“Mew?”

“Yeah, he was doing’ some stuff his boss told him not to do, so I got paid to, ahem, un-alive him,” he said in a discreet voice while also whispering very indiscreetly. The man tilted his head again, and exclaimed, “What do you mean, it’s a kitten and it doesn’t care? That explanation wasn’t for her!”

Uninterested, you began wandering away, until the man in red grabbed you by your midsection and pulled you back. “Uh, excuse me? I’m trying to provide some imperative exposition here?”

“Mew!” you whined, staring at the red stains that have somehow grown bigger. You then began to stare at him.

“Oh, we’re gonna play that game, are we?” he asked, putting his hands on his hips defiantly. “We’ll see about that!” 

The man immediately kneeled down and faced you, his white eyes concentrated on your own. After a few seconds, you decided that you were bored and began wandering away again.

He rolled his eyes and scoffed. “Fine. Be that way. But I’m going.”

“Mew,” you said happily, digging your tiny paws into the dirt you were born in. The man looked back at your tiny body as you were slowly making your way deeper and deeper into the hole you were creating. 

He groaned and lifted the bottom of his mask so that his chin and mouth were showing as he stomped back over to you. Right before you fell into your hole, he scooped you up and walked with you outside. You craned your head, trying desperately to find the hole you made. “Mew!”

“Hey, I get it, you have an unhealthy obsession with dirt, but I need a sidekick!” he exclaimed.

“Mew,” you complained.

“You’ll like being with me!” he assured cheerfully. “I saw the blueprint thingies that guy made, and apparently, he was making some forever-hunting skeleton warriors or something like that. I’m thinking you’re some kind of immortal, fluffy, assassin kitten?”

“Mew,” you replied, playing with the flap of dry skin hanging from his mouth.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” he said happily. “From now on, you’ll be known as Mini Deadpool!”

“Mew!” you exclaimed, spotting a butterfly pass by.

“I’ll get you your own katana later,” he decided.

~~~~~~

Time Skip brought to you by Deadpool’s Chimichangas

~~~~~~

As it turns out, you didn’t need any katanas. It wasn’t long before the mercenary found out that his guess at your immortality was right, as after you accidentally bumped into a table and had glass break on you, the wound healed almost instantly, and you hadn’t grown since he first found you. 

Something else he discovered as he fed you some of his leftover chimichangas was that your claws were wicked sharp enough to shred metal, you could run at the speed of light, can lift objects fifty times your size, and for some reason, your fur stayed fluffy even if you got wet.

Don’t ask how he found out all that while feeding you.  
That’s his business.

But anyhow, over time, you grew a reputation, which mostly involved the term, “Deadpool’s Crazy-Ass Kitten,” which, through the way your owner talked about it, must have been very flattering. You also knew it was a good thing, because whenever you walked through that one scary street, the storekeepers would leave fresh milk. Yummy.

However, there came a day where your entire life would turn around.

You got lost.


	2. You Find A Chimichanga

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing can stop this little kitten when she gets hungry.
> 
> Absolutely nothing.

You were a very curious kitten.  
Notably, your owner was very much so as well. Not that he’s, you know, a kitten.

On the morning of that very memorable day, you sat on the ground of your owner’s apartment, playing with a ball of yarn, while Wade laid on the couch, talking to himself as usual. Of course, this didn’t bother you, as long as your owner’s imaginary friend didn’t keep him from playing with and feeding you.

Wade told you not to trust the voices, so you didn’t. Sometimes you answered, but mostly you just fell off of whatever you were standing on. That happened a lot.

“I’m telling you, it’s a good idea!” he exclaimed.

“They’re gonna kill you,” a deeper voice retorted. “They’re part of your haters crowd, remember?”

“It’s not like I’m gonna un-alive anyone or anything!” Wade replied haughtily, sitting up on the couch. “Just wanna see what kind of new toys they got there!”

“Meow,” you said, confused as to how the ball of yarn turned into a long, thin piece of string. 

“See? Mini Deadpool agrees!” your owner cried out, reaching over to pick you up, string and all. “Let’s go!”

At that moment, your tiny stomach growled, and you mewled, trying to get Deadpool’s attention. He glanced at you for a second and groaned. “I’ll get you a chimichanga later, but first we gotta pay a little visit to the Eye-Patch Man!”

“Mew?” you questioned, the thought of hunger temporarily put out of your head. Wade nodded eagerly as he tucked you in that little invisible pocket especially for you.

“Yes, my little kitty,” he said, his voice impersonating one of an elderly man. “The Eye-Patch Man. Known throughout for his obvious eye-patch and his floating ship in the sky!”

“Mew!” you exclaimed, attempting to dig yourself deeper into his pocket. Wade stuck his hand to get you out and put you on his shoulder cheerfully.

“Okay, so here’s the plan,” he said in his normal voice, slipping past the security guards watching the governor or whatever and made his way into the waiting helicopter. Just pure luck that a helicopter with nobody in it was lurking just behind his apartment. As the chopper lifted into the sky, the guards yelled after him, which he responded with a little wave. You mewed.

“I’m gonna get rid of the security systems with my wicked moves and katana, while you distract the guards,” he yelled over the sound of the blades.

“Meow!” you said as loud as you could, verbally addressing your agreement.

Deadpool patted your head while keeping his other hand on the controls. “You’re gonna act all cute and stuff, like you always do, and show off your fluff or whatever, and I’ll take a quick peek in the weapons room, maybe take a bomb or two! How’s that sound?”

“Mew,” you cooed, rubbing your tiny head against his thigh. 

Wade laughed in delight. “Aw, you’re so cute! Perfect for a distraction!”

~~~~~~

“I TAKE IT BACK!” Wade screamed, running through the halls of the SHIELD training area, which, currently, was on real-time defensive mode, shooting the merc with sun-heat based lasers and week-old bread. “OKAY, OKAY, I’LL GO!” With that, he swung his way out the hatch to the top, Spidey-style and rushed into the helicopter. 

The moment he stepped into the first place with a security camera, the defenses acted immediately, and blaring above him, the speaker yelled, “CODE DEADPOOL, CODE DEADPOOL.” Apparently, they liked him enough to have an entire code named after him!

As he hopped inside and quickly switched on the controls, the voices in his head told him that he forgot something, something very important, inside the helicarrier. But then the author informed him that him forgetting whatever it was was important for the plot. Otherwise, there’d be no story.

~~~~~~

You were supposed to distract the guards, but obviously, you did something else. 

What was your owner supposed to expect? You were a cat. You did what you wanted.

At the moment, you were chasing a butterfly through the halls of the helicarrier, carefree and not at all worried about the fact that the winged insect was leading you into a chamber labeled, “Danger Room.” And yes, you could read.

It was necessary what with the amount of times Deadpool lost you in New York. So, of course, this implies that the last statement in the previous chapter referred to a different definition of “lost”. This time, you didn’t even know you were, but was also sure, at the very back of your little kitty mind, that Deadpool was going to call for you when it was time to go.

“Mew!” you exclaimed, as the butterfly flew up into a hole in the wall. You tried to pounce after it, but the hole was far too high up. After mewling pathetically, a familiar scent suddenly hit your nose heavily. 

Your small stomach chose that moment to remind you of the fact that Deadpool had forgotten to feed you this morning. He did so last night, but that seemed so long ago…

Chimichangas! you thought excitedly, your nose lifting up in recognizing the delicious smell. The only sound in the hall was the near-silent padding of your paws and your occasional mew in delight at the smell as you made your way towards it.

You sniffed the ground, making a face at its disgustingly human excretion-like scent, before bumping into a wall. “Mew,” you whined, poking the wall.

Suddenly, you heard a sound come from a little ways above you, and you looked up curiously. The smell seemed more present from there, so, with a delighted, “Mew!”, you jumped up to the table, and into the open vent.

It was darker on the inside, causing you to initially hide yourself behind your paws instinctively, but your stomach insisted on moving forward, no matter how scary the dark was. Slowly, you walked through the twisting maze, your steps becoming more evident with the clang of metal, as your nose led the way.

~~~~~~

“Sir-”

“I know,” Fury said, suppressing a sigh. How Deadpool managed to break in this time, while the Helicarrier was in the air, he probably would never know, though he highly suspected the reason was more for amusement than anything else. “The specialized defense systems?”

“Drove him off, sir,” the agent assured. Fury nodded, and he scampered away. The Director of SHIELD shook his head slowly, which did not go unnoticed by his second-in-command.

“Avengers Tower gets a visit from that guy every few days as well, sir,” Hill offered. “Tony gets less than pleased when he shows up.”

“Good for him,” he grumbled, taking his gaze away from the giant windows out looking the sky. “Did Deadpool break anything important?”

“Negative, sir.”

“Alright, then,” he said, before his one eye turned to glare at an agent behind a computer, trying to act discreet as he ate a huge chimichanga. “Lunch for you happens in half an hour, Brinks,” Fury called out, much to the other man’s obvious shock. He dropped the food back in his bag and began typing furiously.

Fury let out a quick breath before turning back to his second-in-command. “How are-”

“Sir…” Hill interrupted, her eyes glued to the ceiling. Fury followed her gaze, right before something small and slightly furry that smelled of a familiar mix of death and Mexican food landed on his face.

“Mew!” you cried out, realizing that what you landed on, was in fact, not a chimichanga. 

“Get it off!” Fury ordered through gritted teeth as he pulled on whatever landed on him as hard as he could.

The way he pulled you hurt, causing you to dig your claws a little bit deeper in his scalp. Hill and the other agents just froze where they were, staring at the kitten the Director of SHIELD was losing a fight with. “Sir, that’s a kitten,” Hill stated, her voice trailing off.

Silence filled the room, excepting Fury’s grunts of effort and your mews, for a moment before a shot rang out in the air. Everyone’s head jerked to the direction of the shot, which belonged to the same man who was eating a chimichanga prior, who also tried to hide his gun behind his back in embarrassment.

Fury didn’t get hit, fortunately, but the kitten donned with a red and black mask did. It fell to the ground, staring at the little hole on its side.

Tentatively, you poked it, and mewed. Before long, however, it closed, and the bullet came out of your side with an audible “Pop!” You stared at the bullet for a second, and nudged it before looking back up at the man who you accidentally assaulted. “Mew?” you asked, stepping towards him , which was your way of asking, “Do you have chimichangas?” Deadpool always seemed to understand that.

He backed away, his stoic eyes focused on your pleading ones. “I’m gonna kill that merc,” he muttered.

“Meow!” you exclaimed, jumping a little. Good! So this man was friends with your owner! Before you could utter another mew, however, your nose picked up a certain, utterly delicious scent, this time, being closer than ever.

“That’s a kitten,” Hill repeated.

“Deadpool’s kitten,” Fury growled, rubbing the back of his neck as you moved away from his leg. “I should’ve seen that coming.”

“What do we do with it, sir?”

Fury began to answer, but his attention was stolen by the fact that the kitten was no longer in front of him.

In its place, was a saber-tooth tiger, complete with Deadpool’s mask, claws the size of his hand, two pointed teeth the size of his foot, and really fluffy fur.

Hill dropped her gun, something Fury knew for a fact she would never do, even if startled. “Good God…”

“MEW!” you roared, your voice a tad louder than usual. With that, you bounded through the room, knocking over everything in sight, looking for the source of that maddeningly close spicy scent. You peeked under the tables, but when your head wouldn’t fit, you pushed the entire thing over, in hopes of finding a good-sized chimichanga hiding underneath.

When there turned out to be nothing but crackling wires, you whined and bounded to the other side of the room, creating a destructive path in your wake. You weren’t very big, only about three feet tall and five feet long, but the fact that you were actually jumping from table to table helped cause this trail of demolition.

You took a small closet door in your teeth and tore it off its hinges, tossing it to the side. As you peeked inside, you barely noticed the numerous number of different sized bullets making its way through you, and coming out the other side. Your rapid regeneration and healing ability made sure of that. The agents of SHIELD, however, took note, and were becoming greatly worried.

“Nothing’s happening, sir!” Hill exclaimed through gritted teeth. 

“I know that,” he replied, trying to stay calm. Then, in a louder voice, he ordered, “Stop shooting!”

“MEW!” you whined loudly, stomping away from the closet, disappointed that all you found in there were brooms and mops. All of a sudden, you smelled the scent again! This time, though, you wondered whether or not you should really trust your nose, as it kept telling you that food was close, but wouldn’t tell where.

You looked up at the agents who were currently in the process of lowering their guns. Cocking your head, you asked, “Mew?”

When they didn’t answer, you took a few steps toward them, and asked again, in a louder voice, “MEW?”

“Orders, sir?” Hill asked in a quiet voice, her gaze fixed on the approaching feline.

Suddenly, the ominous mood was broken by the sound of paper crinkling. Fury, temporarily forgetting about the cat, turned to glare at Agent Brinker, who was yet again attempting to eat his chimichanga. He froze in his spot, then slowly began putting his lunch back in his bag, with the annoyed eye of SHIELD’s director anchored on him.

You noticed, though. “MEW!” you exclaimed, startling both Brinker and Fury. As you bounded towards the agent, Fury tried to block your path with his own body, but you pushed him away like an old rag doll.

“Brinker!” Fury yelled, but it was...from what he heard...it was too late.

The agent’s scream resonated through the hall, but disappeared just as quickly. Fury let out a breath, closing his eyes in the process. 

Brinker sat on the side of the wall, his eyes left wide open in fear. And yes, he was alive. You sat on his lap, in regular kitty form, tilted your head, mewed, then clamped your teeth on the package the chimichanga was wrapped in. 

The agents, and an emotionless Nick Fury, watched as you dragged your victim out onto the middle of the floor, unwrapped him with your claws, and take the biggest bite out of him that anyone thought a little kitty could make.

You smacked as you chewed, burying your head into the chimichanga’s spicy goodness. “Meow,” you said contentedly, taking another bite.

Fury slowly made his way up to you and crouched to your level. He poked the back of your head, and instinctively, you covered your food with your paws, growling slightly, until he let go.

“Fury…?” Hill called out.

The door opened to reveal Coulson speaking into his phone, presumably to Steve Rogers. However, as soon as his eyes scanned the room, he dropped the phone. “I was literally gone for five minutes,” he said in disbelief, walking towards the director. “What happened?”

“This happened,” Fury replied, looking up at Coulson’s shocked face briefly before turning back to the still-eating kitten. 

“How’d it get in here?” Coulson asked, his eyes glued on the small kitten. You noticed his feet directly in front of you, looked up, and stared at him for a little bit, sending out the silent message to not touch your food, then happily went back to eating your chimichanga.

“Deadpool,” the director answered simply, before making his way back to his feet.

“Where did he go?” 

“Somewhere. I don’t really care.”

“Okay, then…” Coulson said slowly. “Do we...call animal control, cause this thing ripped up the control center, or…?”


	3. You Meet Pietro

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You help defeat the Enchantress! Yay!  
> You meet a new friend with fluffy hair! Yay!  
> You pee all over the floor! Not yay for the janitors!

It took you nearly an hour to finish that delicious chimichanga. 

What did one expect? You were a very tiny kitten.

Anyways, for a whole hour, your head was buried in the gigantic mound of a delicious mix of spice and carbs, your sensitive nose relishing each bite as the delectable smell wafted from the well-cooked meat. In fact, you were so focused on the chimichanga deliciousness that you didn’t even notice the directions Fury gave to his agents regarding you.

“Force it in,” he ordered, and the agents moved to do so, only to discover that, subconsciously, you used your super strength in order to stay where you were in order to eat. 

“Why don’t you just put it in a regular animal carrier?” Coulson inquired, his brow furrowing as he watched the agents struggle to push you.

“It’ll probably tear it apart,” Fury replied in a gruff voice. “This cage is the next best thing.”

“Sir, with all due respect, it’s a kitten,” Coulson stated promptly. “It’s not the Hulk. Or a homicidal Asgardian bent on dominating the world.”

“And it tore up our main control center,” Fury interjected. “Extremely rapid healing factor, being able to morph into a saber-tooth tiger, razor-sharp claws, incredible strength, sure, why don’t we hand it over to the adoption center?”

The agent stayed silent for a second before sighing. “It’s still just a kitten. If Deadpool really raised this thing, then it probably wasn’t given what it needed-”

“Ha! Got it!” Brinker yelled triumphantly, holding up the chimichanga he wrestled from you with miniscule sized bites taken out of it. 

You noticed, and meowed, annoyed, before grabbing on to his right leg and dragging him through the nearly destroyed control room, the man screaming as you went. The cool air whooshed through your fluffy fur as you ran, and you managed to ignore your victim’s yells as he hit his head numerous times on the debris you left.

“Mew!” you yelled, looking behind you to see if he let go of the chimichanga yet. As you did, right on cue, your food went flying out of his hands and landed at the director’s feet. You let go of the whimpering agent and quietly walked over to Fury.

“It’s got super speed,” Coulson said.

“Never would have guessed,” Fury retorted, before picking up the chimichanga. You mewed, and prepared to take his feet, too, but then the director bent down to wave the chimichanga in front of your face. Both your head and eyes followed it, forgetting everything else except the food in front of you. “You want this?” the director asked.

“Mew,” you murmured, still following the chimichanga.

“Hill, get over here and led this thing to the cage,” Fury requested, and Maria moved from her spot to do so. She took the chimichanga from his hands and followed what he did, waving the food in front of your face as she walked backwards in the direction of the glass prison previously rebuilt since that “Coulson dying, Thor almost crashing down to Earth on it” incident.

Silence filled the air for a second before Coulson shook his head. “That’s a really fluffy kitten.”

~~~~~~

“Meow?” you inquired, looking under the wrapper to see if there were any more bits of that delicious chimichanga. “Meow,” you confirmed sadly, nudging away the paper in disappointment. That’s when you realized that the room you were in was kind of scary.

“Mew!” you cried, running over to the door at the far end of the room in hopes that it wasn’t locked. Suddenly, your furry head slammed into something invisible, causing you to fall to the floor in surprise. You meowed apprehensively as you stood up on your hind legs, testing out this new barrier with your front paws.

“Built for something a lot stronger than you,” a familiar voice said from behind you. Immediately, you turned around to face the director of SHIELD’s stoic expression.

“Meow,” you replied.

Fury, realizing you probably couldn’t understand what he was saying (though you could, you just didn’t care) pressed a red button, and immediately, you heard a very loud and startling sound from directly below you. Clutching you the wall, you meowed in fright before realizing that you weren’t falling.

“Five thousand feet in a steel trap,” Fury shouted, before clicking the button again, thus causing the gates below your cage close up. “You get how that works?”

“Meow.”

“Ant…” he said, pointing at you, and then turned to motion at the button. “-boot.”

“Sir…” An agent peeked their head in at the entrance, looking around anxiously. “The Avengers are here.” The director nodded, and with that, the agent shut the door behind him loudly, causing you to look around in surprise.

“MEW!” you yelled, temporarily startling the director. He blinked, relieved that he was able to recover quickly without the cameras having to witness that a kitten scared him. You were tempted to growl frustratingly, but Wade raised you to be a very cheerful kitty. 

In fact, he told you that instead, you could try fixing the problem. But how would you solve this one? You were trapped in a cage, and with a push of a button, the scary man could kill you easily, and it could take a long time before all of your limbs regenerate. And by the time you did heal, you’d have missed lunch.

What would Wade do? you thought, your tail waving side to side anxiously. Your first thought would be that he would undoubtedly try to unalive them, but that wasn’t really possible here. Plus, you hated blood on your fur. 

Wait a second...What was the name of the plan Wade came up for you whenever you got interrogated by some apparently crazy guy who thought that you would answer his questions? He said it was always guaranteed to work…

Oh, that’s right.  
“Merc With The Mew.”

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew,” you pleaded in a high pitched tone, standing up to set your front paws in front of you. “Mew? Meeeeew, mew, mew, meeeeeee-”

Fury blinked.

“Meeeew, mew, mew, mew! Meeeeeeee-”

“What the heck is that, Fury?” a new voice asked from your behind.

Instantly, you turned around and continued your annoying, but somewhat adorable, meowing. “Meeeeeew, mew, mew, mew, mew! Meeeeeeew?”

The man who walked in plugged his fingers in his ear as he walked over to the director. “I swear, this is why dogs hate cats,” he grumbled.

As you continued to meow loudly, Fury asked, “You can hear it from up there, Barton?”

“Speedy noticed it first,” Clint mumbled. “Why do you have a kitten in the cage, though?”

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee-”

 

“...I don’t know.”

Still covering his ears, Barton observed the meowing kitten, your front paws resting on the glass walls of the cage, your large eyes shimmering as you stared imploringly at him. Usually, Clint didn’t sympathize with things Fury deemed dangerous enough for the glass cage, main evidence being the “Loki Experience,” but this time... 

Your meowing was annoying, but come on, Fury didn’t seriously believe because of that, a baby kitten deserved to be in a cage?

All of a sudden, the ship lurched to the side, causing you to break in your meowing and fall to the side. The two men, reacting quickly, grabbed on to the handrail and began to make their way to the entrance. The same agent that was inside earlier came back in, tripping with the ship.

“What’s going on?” Clint yelled.

The agent tried to look professional as he hugged the wall for dear life. “An Asgardian, Barton. Not friendly...”

Clint groaned. “And today is the day we decide to let Thor and Steve take Loki and Bucky to the adoption center.”

A particular violent quake almost knocked the archer off of his feet, but Fury grabbed him quickly. “Let’s move.”

“Meow!” you interjected, trying to get their attention. The shaking was starting to become very scary, as its large-scale force impacted heavily on your tiny fluffy body, throwing you side to side without relent. You could only watch as they exited the room, completely forgetting about the little kitten they imprisoned.

“Meow…” you grumbled, your paws wrapping around the poles holding up the bench in the room. Meowing loudly probably wouldn’t do you any more good, so, as Deadpool stated, “In a sticky situation, the only way to go is up!”

He didn’t actually say that. It was really a quote from a movie Wade showed you. But it seems more helpful if you believe that it was him who said it.

Your head craned itself to look through every corner of the glass prison. Oxygen was still coursing through your lungs, so air had to come in from somewhere…

Aha! There! 

Meowing happily, you lifted yourself up onto the bench, still clutching on tight. Directly above you was a small vent, just big enough to fit you, that is, if you were able to even open the hatch. Considering that the height was just high enough so that you could probably jump and barely wriggle yourself up there, opening the hatch was most likely going to be a very rigorous and difficult task.

You stomped your paw on the bench and mewed.

It fell.

Phew, that was a lot of work, you thought, watching the cover drop past you harmlessly. You would have preferred it if you just had to blink, but oh well.

Jumping up into the air, you did as you planned, your claws grasping on to the edge of the vent. It was even tinier than the one you were in before, but it was more illuminated, at least. Meowing, you began making your way to freedom, and chimichangas, one step at a time.

~~~~~~

From below you, there were a few shouts, a few screams, and a few blasts. It should have scared you, as loud noises did, but you were too overjoyed with the fact that you were reunited with your friend, the butterfly, once more.

“Meeeeeew, mew...meeeeeew, mew mew…” you sang, your meows in rhythm with the Blues Brother’s theme song as you attempted to pounce on the flying insect. Unfortunately, she must have heard you, because she flew through a small hole on the floor of the vent.

“Meow!” you yelped, not seeing the hole until the very last second. Falling into it, you tried to grasp for the sides again, but the metal was far too smooth and polished for you sharp kitty claws to do anything more than scratch it a little.

As you prepared for ground impact, you closed your eyes, feeling the air whoosh through your fluff. Suddenly, however, the whooshing stopped, but your bones didn’t rush to fix themselves. You couldn’t even feel any broken bones. 

“Mew?” you questioned, peeking through your paws. A man with nice white hair grinned from above you, stroking the top of your head with his thumb gently. “Mew,” you said, fascinated with the color of his hair.

“Where did you come from?” he asked, tilting his head. He had a funny way of talking, but at the same time, you figured that most humans found the way you talk even funnier. After all, “meow, meow,” sounded the same as “meow, meow.” Yet, those two meant very different things. So, you usually relied on your physical abilities to communicate.

“Meow!” you exclaimed, pointing your nose up at the hole. The man looked up, then turned back to you with a playful smile. 

“So you were that high-pitched sound I heard when I got here!” he laughed, showing off teeth that seemed as perfect to you as his hair. “I’ve heard little kittens cry for their mothers before, but you were something else entirely!”

“Mew,” you thanked, filled with pride. You were starting to really like this human.

“Hey...where is your mother?” he asked, his smile faltering slightly.

You frowned a little. Really...you’ve never thought about that question before. Yes, you were created in a laboratory, along with your brothers and sisters, but you were created from a saber-tooth tiger based formula. Did that mean that the tiger used in the concoction was your mother? Or was the scientist that created you your parent?

Shuddering, you hoped that wasn't the case. A parent who killed his children might not be the one you want to ask to give you a tongue-bath.

But then...who was supposed to give you a tongue-bath?

“Meow,” you replied sadly, dropping your eyes to his hand.

“Oh no,” he murmured, hugging you to his chest. “It’s okay, pisoi mic, I know how you feel.”

“Mew,” you whimpered, burying your head in his neck.

“I lost my parents, too,” he sympathized, rubbing your back soothingly. “In a bombing. But at least I was able to keep my sister and me safe. Do you have any siblings?”

You began to whimper uncontrollably, your claws digging through his shirt. He gasped slightly, before hugging you a little harder. “I’m so sorry.”

“Well, well, well,” a dry female voice said from behind the man. Immediately, he tucked you into a floppy pocket, safe from wandering eyes. You ceased your whimpering, knowing what a situation where you had to be quiet looks like.

“If it isn’t an ‘Avenger,’” the lady said sarcastically. “Oh no! Better escape while I can!”

“Thor is not here,” the man snarled.

She laughed, but it wasn’t anything like the one the nice man had. Her laugh could easily be compared to music. You know, the kind that Sirens used to lure poor sailors to their shores so they could eat them up?

“What makes you think I’m looking for Thor? Maybe I’m looking for someone else.” 

“I...What do you want, then?” he said angrily.

The woman sighed heavily, and by the sound of her footsteps, she seemed to be pacing around the hall. “Oh, I don’t know. Asgard? Thor’s love? Honestly, it varies with the moment. But in this very moment, however-”

Jolting forward, your reaction of grabbing tight to the fabric of the pocket seemed incredibly slow compared to how the scenery outside zipped past, similar to how it was whenever you wanted to run fast.

As quick as the change started, it stopped, and you were thrown back, forcibly bending your tail at a weird angle in the process. You held back a pained meow reluctantly, instead opting for hugging your injured body part desperately.

“Perhaps my goal had been to get rid of every vulnerable Avenger on this cursed realm,” the mean lady growled, her voice sounding a lot closer. “I can’t rely on the pathetic creatures against your friends to do so, apparently. If you want something done, you must do it yourself, as the saying goes.”

Your tail pricked up, the pain no longer evident. That line...you didn’t like it. Not at all.

And you certainly didn’t like the way it was directed towards your new friend…

“MEOW!” you yelled, jumping out of the pocket. You charged at the surprised woman at full speed, fully intending to knock her over with a single blow. Gathering your super strength, your paws filled themselves with even more energy to fulfill your goal to the point where she had a bloody nose.

Instead, you tripped and fell on your face, directly in front of her.

She laughed, picking you up by the scruff of your neck, practically forcing you to meet her bright green eyes. “What is this? Some kind of Midgardian pest?”

“Let her go!” the man yelled, making you look back. It looked as if he was stuck to the wall, as sweat plastered his white hair to his forehead through his apparent effort, but it didn’t seem to do anything. “She didn’t do anything!”

The lady hummed thoughtfully, twirling you around while you struggled and attempted to claw her with no avail. “What do we do with pests, I wonder? Oh, wait I remember!”

At that, she grabbed your tail and pulled. “MEW!” you cried, covering your face with your paws. You didn’t want to hit the lady anymore. She was too scary.

She laughed gleefully, her soft hands still uncomfortably clutching your tail in a solid hold. “Do you know, little pest?” she asked, leaning forward.

“It’s-it’s okay, pisoi mic, don’t be scared!” the man shouted, but you didn’t react.

The lady released your tail, but almost immediately, a heat with the intensity of an open fire lit up beneath you. “We exterminate them,” she whisper in your ears.

“MEW!” you cried loudly, and...wow…

This is kind of embarrassing.

You may have peed on her…

Once you were done, she looked down in horror at her ruined shoes, then back at you. “Mew,” you said in relief.

“You...insolent-” She dropped you to the ground harshly and held both her hands up, a hot green glow growing from her fingertips. You vaguely heard your friend scream from behind you, but you were far too interested in your pee. The puddle was really big!

(And yes, by now, the reader should have realized that the size of your attention span was similar to that of a mustard seed.)

“What in the…” The fire in her hands abruptly died, and as she attempted to move them, they refused to do so. “WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, PEST?”

“Mew,” you said sturdily, poking the puddle with the tip of your paw. Wasn’t it bad enough that you had this weird obsession with dirt? Now your pee?

“Pisoi mic,” your friend said breathily, picking you up and hugging you to his chest once more. All of sudden, you remembered what happened right before you peed in fear. The scary lady. Her threatening your new friend. Losing your butterfly pet.

You welcomed the warmth and snuggled deep into him.  
“Meow.”

He chuckled, more in relief than anything, really. “It seems as if your little tinkle immobilized the Enchantress. How did you do that? Are you magic?”

“Mew!” you said excitedly, finally being in reach of touching the man’s white curls. You pushed them back and forth rapidly.

“It’s a magic kitten alright,” a familiar voice said gravely from behind you. “Now, for your own safety, Pietro, I suggest you put it down.”

“Pietro,” as he’s called, turns around, a smile on his face as he watched you play with his hair, the situation of the frozen sorceress apparently forgotten. “What are you talking about? If all magic kittens are this fluffy, then I would adopt all the ones in the world!”

“No,” Fury stated simply, stepping forward. Pietro, focused entirely on you, didn’t notice the director approaching until he pulled you from the speedster’s arms. An agent ran by, and Fury nodded his head at the now completely-frozen Enchantress. “Go get the others.”

“Meow!” you called out, looking back at Pietro.

“No! Pisoi mic!” he cried out. “Are you going to drop her outside of the helicarrier?!”

Fury scoffed. “Of course not. We wouldn’t burden the birds like that.”

“Then where are you taking her?” Pietro questioned. A memory sprang to his head, and he paled. “Not...not to be experimented on?”

“We’re not HYDRA,” he stated firmly. “But we are SHIELD, and because we intend on protecting this world, I’m putting her back where she belongs.”

“Mew,” you said, interested in Fury’ eyepatch. As you poked it, he swatted at you, accidentally hitting your eye. “Meow!”

“Are you alright, little one?” Pietro asked anxiously, his footsteps directly behind Fury’s. “Hey, where are you taking her?”

“Solitary confinement,” Fury replied, taking out the key card that opened the door to the glass cage you were previously placed in. You looked back to see a helpless looking Pietro watching, and you wished desperately that you could run back to him, but the director’s grip told you not to try anything. You gave him a look of sadness right before the door slammed with finality.

~~~~~~

“So, the Enchantress broke into the Helicarrier just to get Thor’s attention?”

Clint nodded, a smirk on his face. Sam shook his head, chuckling slowly. “I will never understand how villains work.”

“Welcome to the business, Wilson,” Natasha said dryly, her eyes focused on the controls. “Not everything works.”

“Pietro?” Wanda said softly, interrupting the speedster’s train of thought.

He looked up, his eyes clearly distracted and his mind, like his heart rate, going a million miles an hour. “Yes, Wanda?”

“Are you alright?”

“Um...of course,” he said, wincing at how uncertain he sounded. His sister raised an eyebrow, but she never pried into his mind if he didn’t want her to. That is, unless it involved some embarrassing secret. Then of course she had to know.

In truth, he was thinking about you. The little kitten who fell out of the ceiling, into his hands, and saved his life by peeing on the Enchantress. You didn’t seem too dangerous...but Fury did confirm that you were a magic kitten.

You obviously didn’t have any parents, and judging by your reaction, your siblings were gone, too. Perhaps you were an orphan who was used as a lab experiment? And was the only one of your siblings to survive?

He grit his teeth, thinking about how HYDRA could have impacted his life. If it weren’t for the whole Ultron situation, them giving Stark a chance, and the Avengers giving them one, too, he and Wanda would most likely be something other than heroes today. What about you, though?

Did someone give you a chance?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I GIVE FREE KITTENS TO EVERYONE WHO GAVE KUDOS OR COMMENTED  
> YOU ALL DESERVE IT  
> (Gives out cardboard pictures of kittens)  
> NO TAKEBACKS


	4. You Are Cat-Napped Willingly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pietro busts you out of SHIELD prison! 
> 
>  
> 
> Mew

“Success?”

Steve sighed heavily, falling upon the couch. “Nope.”

Natasha raised an eyebrow as she set herself next to him. “What kind of store wouldn’t let Avengers adopt pets?”

The super soldier shook his head slightly. “It’s wasn’t on me or Thor, but...you know…”

“Oh.” Nat glanced at the archer leaning against the couch, and they nodded simultaneously. Almost everybody had heard about the alien invasion in New York and the attacks in D.C. Nobody could really blame the adoption centers from being reluctant to let the people responsible for those attacks adopt needy animals.

Tony scoffed, flopping onto the leather armchair next to the sofa. “Why do you want to get the Winter Duo a pet anyways? Wanna give Reindeer Games something to torture?”

Thor, wincing visibly, put a hand on the billionaire’s shoulder. “I request that you do not speak of my brother in...such a manner, Stark.”

“We’re all wondering that!” Tony exclaimed.

The thunder god sighed and set his hammer down on the center table, shaking it slightly as the weapon dropped on the smooth wood. “I was on my way to the store of Ralph’s to attain more Pop-Tarts when I saw a very suspicious looking male pass by, his footsteps quick. Beside him was a dog, and...well...when the dog barked for the man’s attention, it seemed as if his entire demeanor altered itself.”

“What do you mean?” Sam asked, furrowing his brow.

“He did not seem at all threatening when his joy became apparent after the animal showered its affection on him,” Thor explained. “I wondered how was that this animal could bring him so much happiness, so I asked him.”

“You just asked him?” Tony exclaimed incredulously.

Thor nodded, not noticing or caring about Tony’s mock surprise. “He stated that before he got his companion, he was a thief, one of the best in his ring of thieves. In society, he said, if you make one mistake, people will most likely label you as such if you had not done anything else memorable. Is this not true?”

“That’s…” The billionaire trailed off, not wanting to voice his agreement.

“The man had no other skills, as he gave up schooling at a young age to help his parents, but once they died, they left nothing in his name. Later, he began to believe that becoming a thief was what he was to become. Until he found his canine companion, that is.”

“The animal was abandoned in the woods, hungry and frail. He brought it to his home, and took care of it with what little he had. It was a simple act, but the dog treated it as if it meant more to him anything else,” Thor continued.

“It did not care about what he had done, and trusted him as well. It was this fact that gave the man incentive to change his lifestyle into one of more honest virtue…”

The thunderer stared at the out-of-place flower in the bouquet at the center of the table and nudged it gently. “I-I thought that perhaps an animal such as that would create the same effect on Loki,” he murmured.

“I thought the same for Bucky,” Steve added.

“...How about I just buy it?” Tony suggested. “I can, like, buy up fifteen types of rare dogs, You think a chihuahua will do it?”

Thor shook his head. “The dog trusted the man because he saved him, not because he pampered him with luxurious housing.”

“But...Reindeer...he’s gonna…” Tony sputtered.

As Thor shook his head, Steve stood up and clapped Tony on his arm. “We appreciate the thought, Stark, but...as much as I don’t want to admit it...the adoption center has a point. Both Loki and Bucky have the possibility of...accidentally hurting the animal.”

Thor sighed and leaned his head against the table with a thud. “I wish Asgardian animals could be tamed like most Midgardian animals could. They would be more likely to survive if Loki and Bucky accidentally struck them.”

Clint nodded slowly, not noticing a young man with bright blue eyes peek out from behind him until he zipped away, leaving a silver trail in his wake. He frowned.

Where was he going?

~~~~~~

Pietro believed in the theme shown in Thor’s tale, that animals could help people believe that they were more than a mistake. What he wondered if the reversed situation was true…

Could animals who were made to feel like mistakes forgive themselves if the right human comforted them, trusted them, and most importantly, loved them?

He didn’t know what you had done, but obviously, it was bad if it made the stoic director of SHIELD opt to cage you in the same trap that was meant for the Hulk and previously stored an Asgardian. The way Pietro hadn’t questioned Fury more on what you had done made him curse avidly. 

You seemed so adorable, so innocent!

Not something worth being seen as dangerous...

The speedster gritted his teeth, throwing open the door that led to the Avenjet garage. “JARVIS?” he called out, his accent thickening with his anxiety.

“Yes, Master Maximoff?” the AI’s voice responded.

“Prep the Avenjet, will you?”

~~~~~~

Chimichangas.

Tacos.

Ice cream.

Really, you’d settle for anything just about now.

True, you had only eaten about an hour ago, but after you were kidnapped by Wolverine (long story), you found out that your abilities took up most of your energy whenever you used them, and seeing as you were just a tiny little kitty with a tiny little tummy, it wasn’t really a surprise of how much food you needed.

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew,” you groaned, curling up into a fluffy ball. You guessed that the time period was right around “Deadpool Pancake Hour”, where Wade would make a shitload of different colored pancakes, then decide that he wanted tacos instead. That was assumed by the fact that you were suddenly craving the taste of something as fluffy as you were.

(You were talking about the pancakes.)

Lifting your head, you began poking at the ground, wishing that you hadn’t eaten the chimichanga so greedily. Maybe you would have had some left.

“Pisoi mic?”

You jumped, falling off of the bench and landing on your head. “Mew,” you complained.

“I’m sorry,” a familiar voice said, seemingly too excited to keep his voice as quiet as he wanted. “But I’m going to be busting you out of here!”

“Meow!” you exclaimed, running up to the sealed glass door to be near the man on the other side, grinning at you with a glint in his blue eyes. Tilting your head, you put your paws on the door and meowed apprehensively.

In response, Pietro held up a key card and slid it into a slot next to the door, which slid open with a satisfying hiss. “Meow!” you cheered, before jumping up into his outstretched arms.

Pietro hugged you to his chest while rocking back and forth gently. “Are you alright?” he cooed, stroking the top of your head. “They did not do anything to you, I hope?”

“Mew,” you answered, nuzzling your head into the crook of his neck. 

He chuckled and pulled you away from his chest to observe your face. You mewed happily as he scratched your neck affectionately, stretching your head up in the process. “Why would he put you in a cage?” Pietro murmured, furrowing a brow. “What did you do?”

“Meow,” you replied, reaching up in an attempt to touch Pietro’s white curls. He smiled and leaned closer to let you do so, much to your excitement.

Suddenly, you heard voices coming from the entrance of the room, and your tail pricked up involuntarily. “Mew!” you tried to warn.

“Right,” Pietro muttered, clutching your soft body with both of his hands, before carefully placing you in his oversized pocket, watching your tail as he went. “I’m going to have to run very fast, pisoi mic, so it is better if you find something to hold on to in there,” he prompted.

You looked around before deciding to attach your claws to the sleek fabric not pressing onto his skin. Pietro reached a hand in to see if you were secure. “Are you good?”

“Mew,” you affirmed.

“Alright, then. Here I go!”

~~~~~~  
Time Skip brought to you by Loki’s OTPs  
~~~~~~

“Whoo! That was fun!” Pietro exclaimed, holding his pocket out near the bed so you could safely hop out of it. “Wasn’t it?”

“Meow!” you cheered, jumping up and down. It really was fun, though. You couldn’t really see what was happening, but the entire escapade just felt like a rollercoaster ride to you! And then, when Pietro got his bearings after making it back to his invisible space-ship, he even let you steer a little!

Of course, you got scared after you saw the ground so far away, and opted for cowering in Pietro’s pocket again instead, but still!

The speedster couldn’t seem to stop grinning as he tossed you into the air, catching you just before you hit the ground. “I still can’t believe we got away with that!” he said gleefully.

“Mew,” you agreed.

Suddenly, the door swung open, and Pietro scrambled to catch you in midair and hide you, only to fall down himself, nearly break a nearby table, and catch you on his lap as you landed on your feet.

A black haired woman stood at the entrance, her eyebrows arched and her mouth curved in surprise. Silence filled the room for a few moments while you held a staring contest with the new human.

Tentatively, you got off Pietro’s lap and padded towards her. You stepped on her feet, your gigantic eyes leering up at hers, which had followed your movement. “Meow.”

She slowly bent her knees, laying down on the floor so that her body was almost at level with yours. Her bright brown eyes seemed to see through you, observing every thought you’ve ever had and using them to determine your overall character. You thought she was really pretty.

“Mew?” you said, lifting your front paws so that you were in a standing position. You poked her nose hesitantly. Yup. Pretty solid nose.

“Pietro…” the woman said, her accent heavy like the speedster’s. She was speaking to Pietro, but her main focus was on petting your head.

“...Yes, Wanda?” Pietro replied innocently.

“Why do you have a kitten?”

“...Why don’t you have a kitten?”   
Wanda finally looked up at him with an unreadable expression.

Pietro let out a heavy breath. “Okay, fine. I may have kidnapped her from SHIELD. Just maybe.”

His sister continued to stare at him.

“Don’t look at me like that!” he exclaimed defensively. “I couldn’t stand to see this sweet pisoi mic locked up like an animal!”

“It is an animal,” Wanda replied stoically. 

“You know what I mean!”

The Avenger sighed softly, looking back down at a very fluffy kitty, who was watching their conversation very intently without much apprehension. “So...you broke into SHIELD...to kidnap a kitten?”

“Yes!” Pietro exploded. “Is very cute kitten!”

“Meow,” you agreed.

Wanda picked you up and brought you up to her face, where you attempted to reach out in order to touch her soft-looking hair. “Did you say she was...locked up?”

“Um, maybe?”

“Pietro, it was obviously there for a reason. You cannot just kidnap animals because they’re adorable,” his sister chastised. 

“First of all, it’s a she, and second of all, she’s not just adorable, she’s fluffy!” her brother exclaimed, flopping down to the floor and taking you from his sister’s hands. “Aren’t you?” Pietro asked, grinning as you nuzzled your head against his arm.

“Mew,” you replied contentedly.

At this, Wanda’s mouth twitched, and her brother’s grin grew wider at the sight. “Okay, so it is...very fluffy-”

“Mew.”

“...and adorable. But what are you going to do now?”

“What do you mean?” Pietro questioned, poking your nose and gleefully watching your reaction. “I am going to feed her, bathe her, play with her, and snuggle with her!”

Wanda resisted the impulse to roll her eyes. “I meant now. Steve sent me up here, since JARVIS told us you were back, that we are going on a mission in Kansas. What are you going to do with the kitten?”

Pietro’s grin faded as his eyes flicked to your wonder-filled ones. One option was to leave you with a caretaker, but he dismissed that immediately, mostly due to his fear for the possibility that they could hurt you.

“How long is the mission?” he asked.

“Few hours at most.”

“Then it’s settled,” he decided, setting you on the bed. “I will leave my pisoi mic in my room, and go on the mission.”

You watched at Wanda frowned, propping herself on her arms before getting up. “Pietro…”

“She will be fine!” he insisted, cupping your cheeks and squeezing them slightly. “You’ll behave here, won’t you?”

“Meow!” you promised. 

“See?” Pietro exclaimed, motioning to you.

Wanda let out a huff, but didn’t say anything, only grabbed her brother by the arm and dragged him out the door. “Good-bye, pisoi mic!” he called out, leaning his head in the door to prolong his farewells. “Stay safe!”

~~~~~~

Back in the cage, you had wondered why it was taking so long for your owner to come. Surely he would have come looking for you, right?

He wouldn’t leave his tiny kitten out, lost and alone, to starve, right?

Then again...in one of the books you read in the library near Wade’s apartment (yes, you read books at the library), you found a story about a child who was adopted by a family who didn’t really love him, and only did so because they needed more children to qualify for a tax reduction or something. The point was, the family didn’t love him, so he attempted to find solace in his birth parents.

Who turned out to be psychopaths.

In the end, neither family was good for the boy, so when he got into a fatal accident on the highway, you started crying. And that's when the librarian heard you.

During the process of being kicked out, you wondered if that situation was in any way similar to yours. At that time, you immediately perished the thought, believing that Deadpool loved you very much and wanted to take care of you.

You time in the cage, though, gave you much different thoughts. What were one of his first words to you? “I need a sidekick?”

……

Certainly, you didn’t want to end up like that boy in the story. Which was why you were excited when you met Pietro, who you liked to cuddle with and who liked to cuddle with you, apparently. You didn’t want to ruin your friendship with him, so you swore to yourself that you would behave and stay put.

But you were so hungry...


	5. You Get A New Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You knocked out Buck and Loki.  
> Thor ate your chimichanga.  
> Fury let you stay.
> 
> Everyone found out Loki planned to use cats in his scheme for world domination.

You mentally made a note to add “vents” to your list of obsessions.

Currently on the list: dirt, pee, meowing, and hair. Especially Pietro’s.

Wade didn’t have much hair.

Anyways, you were just sitting in Pietro’s room, trying to ignore your rumbling tummy in an attempt to cooperate with your new owner’s request to behave, but it just became too much. Meowing, you hopped off the bed and ran towards the door. You patted it gently, and realized that you could probably knock it down with one blow.

*sigh*

Too bad that wasn’t an option. 

“Mew,” you said, disappointed, sitting down on the fuzzy carpet. As you craned your head in every which way, you suddenly jumped up in excitement. There! A vent on the wall! Great!

Mewling in anticipation, you hopped happily at the fact that this vent was, not on the ceiling, but near the ground, and gleefully rushed towards it. After nudging your head against it, you wondered how much work you were going to have to do to open it. 

First, you tried tickling it.

Success!

The door’s screws popped out, and the door fell to the ground at your feet. “Mew,” you said smugly, poking the door with your paw. You then proceeded to make your way into the vent.

~~~  
Vent Time Skip  
~~~

Finally, after what seemed like ages of almost turning into dead ends or kitty-destroying fans, you finally found an exit that didn’t seem to want to kill you. Pushing down the door with your kitty paws, you took a deep breath before jumping.

“Mew!” you cheered, as air whipped past you and ruffled your fluff.

Bucky Barnes looked up from his book, hearing a high pitched sound come from the hall. Walking up to the door, he pushed it open quickly, only to find nothing out of order.

Except…  
Furrowing his brows, he bent down to pick up a vent door lying on the floor, and looked up at the open vent. Had he been there a second earlier, he would have seen a fluffy kitten falling from the said vent and tumble down the stairs below.

“Mew, mew, mew,” you grunted, each time your head collided with something. Finally, the ground became level, and you dizzily stood up and shook your head. After finding your bearings, you swivel your head around the enormous room, marveling at how clean it was. 

Wade’s apartment was filled to the brim with trash, dirt, blood, and more trash. When you first got there, you almost died at the stench, but over time, you just got used to it. You didn’t even realize that houses weren’t supposed to be that dirty.

“Meow,” you commented, poking a hammer that sat next to a brown recliner. In observing it very critically, you decided that it would make a good weapon, and wriggled your body into the grip at the handle. After making sure it was secure, you meowed happily and began walking with it towards what you presumed was the kitchen.

Wow…

The kitchen was so clean! And pretty! And big! It smelled like lemons!

“Mew!” you exclaimed, leaping up onto the counter. It was a bit difficult, as you had to balance the hammer along with you, but it was manageable. Ducking out of under the grip of the hammer, you began to wander around freely, checking to see if all the ingredients that you needed were here.

Can of beans? “Meow.”  
Tortillas? “Meow.”  
Chocolate sauce? “Meow.”

After looking through the fridge, you were delighted to find that everything you needed was here, by the dozens, in fact! You got to work, pulling a skillet out of the cupboard with some difficulty, and placing it gently on the stove. Drizzling it with oil, you were careful to not spill too much, and when you were done, you began to rip apart the packaging for the ground beef.

This was going to be delicious!

~~~

The Winter Soldier was scared of being home alone.

Of course, he wasn’t completely alone. JARVIS was there, and so were the many scientists that worked with Bruce, Tony, and SHIELD. So, it wasn’t the being “alone” part that scared him...it was the fear that someone somehow broke into Avengers Tower and was trying to steal Tony’s stuff.

“Being stupid, Barnes,” he muttered, peeking out into the living room. It wasn’t like he couldn’t defend himself, anyone who thought otherwise obviously didn’t exist, but tiny things still kind of scared him. 

Thankfully, there was no one out in the living room, and he exhaled a breath he didn’t even know he was holding. “JARVIS?” he called out hesitantly.

“Yes, Master Barnes?” the AI answered back pleasantly.

“Is there an intruder on the recreation floor?” Bucky questioned, keeping his voice low.

“Yes, Master Barnes.”

Frick. “Where?”

“The kitchen.”

He involuntarily began breathing heavily when he heard a crash sound in the said location. Immediately, he pressed his back to the wall and attempted to remember the tactics Bruce and Steve taught him that repressed the Winter Soldier. “Calm down, calm down,” Bucky repeated, sliding down to the ground. “Calm-”

“What in Odin’s beard are you doing?”

If anyone else besides a pissed Asgardian and an emotionless AI were watching, they probably would have died with laughter at the sight of a guy as tall and buff as Bucky fumble to the floor, and proceed in tumbling down the stairs.

Bucky groaned, cradling his head, and tried not to lose control because of the glaring god who stood at the middle of the stairs. “Why do you want to know?”

“Does it look like I have anything else better to do?” Loki replied, rolling his eyes as he gracefully made his way down the steps. “Stark’s...companion...informed me of an “intruder” within the premises, so, being the helpful god I am, I decided to expel this said trespasser.”

“Yeah, real helpful,” the super soldier grumbled, pulling himself off of the ground. “You ever think of being a comedian?”

“A Midgardian occupation,” he said, with obvious distaste. “The thought would never even cross my mind.”

“You-”

Dropping the tortilla into the pan, you cocked your ear to the side, pondering at what the sound could be. It seemed like two humans arguing, but didn’t Pietro say that he was going on a mission? It was like when Wade told you he was going on a bounty hunt that was too dangerous for you. The apartment was always so empty, so whenever he left, you turned on the stereo, inserted your favorite music disc, and danced to Taylor Swift songs.

So who were these humans?

Salespeople?  
Murderers?  
Winchesters?

No...wait…Could it be?

Burglars.

You mewed threateningly, eager to prove yourself to your new owner. Wait until he sees how you protected his house from thieves all by yourself!

Bounding across the counter, you picked up the big hammer on the way, shifting its weight constantly on your shoulders so it didn’t start to hurt. Padding out of the kitchen, you spied two men by the stairs, talking. Good. They were distracted.

After gently placing the hammer on the ground, you clamped your mouth around the grip and began to spin it. The effort seemed slow at first, but soon, the hammer was able to gain momentum, and swung around and around really fast! 

Finally, after you decided that you were getting tired, you gave one last burst of effort in directing the hammer at the direction of the intruders.

They passed out, and you were able to finish cooking your chimichanga.

~~~~~~

“So...let me just get this straight,” Tony said, looking up from his black tablet in disbelief. “You...stole a kitten...from SHIELD?”

Pietro tried for a smile. “More or less.”

The billionaire let out a chuckle and turned to look at the table next to his recliner, where the fluffy kitten they were speaking of was currently munching on an enormous chimichanga. “Mew,” you smacked.

Thor got up from his place on the floor and kneeled next to you, observing your tiny figure as you devoured your meal. “It’s so tiny!” he announced, squinting up at Pietro. “How is it that something this seemingly helpless would be able to lift Mjolnir?”

Tony shrugged, his gave averting back to his device. “Security cameras don’t lie, Blondie.”

While Bucky sunk deeper into the sofa, Loki scoffed loudly and made to get up, but Steve came up from behind him and smacked him back down. Knowing he couldn’t do much of anything, the Asgardian flicked his eyes to the ceiling and sat back.

Nat came up behind Stark and peered at the screen, watching closely as you threw the hammer at the two arguing men, who passed out almost instantly. “If I didn’t know who this kitten was, I’d probably want to keep it.”

Pietro sat up from his seat eagerly. “You-you’ve met her?”

The redhead nodded, her eyes focused on the tablet. “She’s Deadpool’s pet.”

“Deadpool? As in that annoying mercenary?” Scott scoffed. “That explains the chimichanga.”

“...Can kittens eat chimichangas?” Clint wondered.

“Supposedly negative, Barton,” Vision replied. “A kitten cannot consume that much in one sitting. That is a trait especially for humans.”

“I am not mortal!” Thor argued. “And I can eat a chimichanga!” 

With that, he stalked over to where you were and grabbed your chimichanga and stuffed it all in his mouth. As the god chewed loudly, his step-brother sighed lowly and rolled his eyes. “You see?” Thor said triumphantly, his mouth still full of food. “A god can eat much more! I like this!”

Silence filled the air for a second before Vision said, “Correction. Gods like to eat as well.”

“Oh my god, Thor,” Bruce muttered.

“Meow!” you yelled, irritated that the big blonde man didn’t even take the time to savor your food properly. Not only that, but he ate your lunch! Now you were hungry!

“What’s the matter, pisoi mic?” Pietro asked, instantly at your side.

“Mew,” you groaned, flipping over so you could point at your growling tummy.

The speedster gasped quietly, and in a flash, you were in his arms, cradled to his chest. “It’s alright, Thor will make you another chimichanga, isn’t that right?” he said, his voice starting out comforting, until he directed them towards the god with a heated glare.

“Of course!” Thor bellowed, and you shrunk back in fear.

“Mew,” you said weakly.

“Great job, Blondie, you scared the kitty!” Tony exclaimed sarcastically. “Why don’t you just take away its mom, too?”

“Already happened, Stark,” Natasha muttered.

Pietro blinked, glancing up at the glaring assassin. “How do you know that?”

She rolled her eyes. “Did you really think that you would be able to sneak into SHIELD? Unnoticed?”

“Um...maybe?”

Nat sighed. “After we went back to the jet, Clint told me about this kitten being held in the glass prison that served as Loki’s cage. I went back to pull some files on it, and in doing so, saw you in the security room’s cameras.”

“...Oh.”

She smirked at his reaction. “Anyways, your little cat isn’t as helpless as she looks.”

Pietro placed his chin on your head, much to your fluffy excitement. “Well...Fury told me that the pisoi mic was a magical kitten, and I did see her freeze the Enchantress-”

“Wait, what?” Sam spluttered. “It wasn’t my magic-matter absorber that did that?”

Tony raised a hand. “Um, that was actually my magic thingie-madoodle?”

“Stark-”

“My little pisoi mic peed on the Asgardian,” Pietro cooed, placing you gently on the table before rubbing your hungry little stomach. 

“Mew,” you said, wiggling around in delight.

“She what?”

“He stated that his animal let loose her excretions on Amora,” Thor clarified. “Such nobility!”

“Hey, if she belongs to Deadpool,” Clint interrupted. “Why isn’t she with him?”

At this, you pushed away Pietro tickling hands and rushed towards the archer with an angry expression. “Mew! Mew mew meow mew. Mew-mew! Meow, meow, meow, mew? Mew!”

“...Is she trying to talk to us?” Tony whispered.

You slapped your paw to your head. “Mew.”

“She said that he abandoned her while trying to steal SHIELD supplies,” Loki stated in a monotone voice. “He never came back for her, despite the fact that he promised her a “chimichanga,” and in the period he was gone, she made the revelation that he never truly cared for her..”

“...You speak cat?” Tony whispered.

Loki shrugged carelessly, examining his long fingers with apparent interest. “The language itself is not difficult to learn. And cats make useful allies for world domination.”

“.....”

“I’m done,” Scott said, walking out of the room.

“What’s a chimichanga in kitten?” Clint wondered.

“Meow,” you replied.

“Ah. That makes sense.”

“How the hell does that make sense?”

“Well, if you spoke cat, Tony-”

“You don’t speak it either, Clint.”

“How do you know I can’t speak cat, Nat?”

“You just asked what a chimichanga was in kitten.”

“Obviously delicious!”

“We just need to all calm down-”

“Calm down, Bruce, are you kidding me? LOKI JUST SAID THAT HE WAS PLANNING TO USE CATS IN HIS PLAN FOR WORLD DOMINATION.”

“Well, that’s-”

“WE’RE DOOMED, MAN. DOOMED!”

“I said that they would make useful allies for world domination! Not that I was going to use them!”

“DOOOOOOOOOO-”

“Is this what happens every time you have time off from saving the world?” a familiar voice asked, unamused.

“Meow,” you whimpered, recognizing it instantly. Looking up at Pietro, you pleadingly put your paws on his shirt, and rubbed your head against him. “Mew.”

“Don’t be scared, pisoi mic, I’ll protect you,” he whispered to you affectionately, before pulling you up to his shoulder. The speedster turned to the stoic director of SHIELD and held his chin up. “You are not going to take away my kitten!”

Fury raised a brow. “It’s not your kitten. It’s Deadpool’s. And even if you were Deadpool, I’d still take it from you. Now, for the second time this week, Pietro, I have to ask you to put the kitten down.”

“No!”

“Kid-”

“Come on, Fury, why you gotta take her back to that glass cell?” Tony intervened. “Speedy likes her!”

“He can have another kitten,” Nick said in a hard voice. “But this thing has to be in solitary confinement.”

“Why?” Pietro exclaimed, his usually cheerful face contorted in a hateful glare. “Is it just because she is magical?”

“Yes.”

“That is not good reason!”

“Too bad,” Fury retorted, reaching out to take you. He was too slow, however, and Pietro had enough time to speed away to the other side of the room, with meowing you in tow. The challenging glare was still set on his face.

“I don’t want another kitten.” Pietro stated calmly.

Fury rolled his eyes as the Avenger pulled you into his loose-fitting jacket, your big head sticking out from the collar. “Meow,” you said.

The director of SHIELD sighed sharply, turning his head towards the other watching Avengers. “One of you better get the Maximoff to give me the kitten.”

“This kitten has been through almost the same thing as Pietro has,” Wanda said furiously. “I checked her memories, and it is clear that she also wants to be with Pietro.”

“And what if someone, say, Doctor Doom gets ahold of the kitten?” Fury fired back. “No doubt he’s going to study her and subject other animals, ones that he trained, to the same experimentation. That’s why I’m worried.”

“Who says that my pisoi mic cannot protect herself?” Pietro interjected.

“It’s a kitten. It’s innocent. It doesn’t know the difference between hostility and defending itself,” Fury claimed.

“Do not insult my kitten that way! She is not dumb!’” Pietro exploded, his face red with anger.

“Fine. She’s a threat,” Nick explained, lowering his voice. “And most certainly not a pet.”

“An Avenger, then?” Tony joked.

“Yes!” Pietro agreed, not hearing the billionaire’s tone. “She can become an Avenger, no? My kitten would learn responsibility, how to use her powers, and you will be able to keep an eye on her!”

“I was joking,” Stark whispered, turning to look pointedly at Steve.

The super soldier could pretty much tell that Fury was about to disagree, and that he was going to take the kitten. He pursed his lips before pushing himself off of the chair. Steve knew he was going to sound ridiculous, but at least there was a chance at Fury listening to him.

“Everyone here has made mistakes,” he said, raising his voice to an octave most listeners would refer to as, “the Captain’s Voice.”

“Something else we all have in common was that our innocence was tainted too young. That’s why we’re here. Early on, we wanted to be part of something bigger than ourselves, the cause of why either due to loss, pain, or anything in between. However, simply being human has an effect in the tainting as well. We react to events, the reactions define our character. But the kitten...it’s not human. It’s innocence cannot be tainted, that part Fury was right about. In different times, though, it can be an advantage.”

“How long is this gonna go on?” Tony hissed at Bruce, who was on his other side.

“This kitten will probably never change. Its character will never change in reaction to events, as the only thing that will are its feelings. That’s why we could use her on the team. Nothing will be able to bring her down.”

“Mew!” you cheered, clapping your paws.

“...You do realize that you’re advocating for a kitten to join the Avengers, right?” Nick scoffed.

“I apologize, Fury, it just seemed to me that you liked to be the judge over who deserved to be locked in a cage for the rest of their life.”

“Point taken.”

“So?” Pietro inquired impatiently.

You held your breath, along with everyone else in the room.

Fury let out a long sigh. “I suppose.”


	6. You Meet Loki

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Your fluff enchants everyone.
> 
> Including the god of mischief.

“-and this is the living room!” Pietro exclaimed cheerfully, holding his cupped hands with you in it higher up. You curiously turned your head back and forth, and settled your examining gaze on a book on the table, labeled “A Separate Peace”, by John Knowles.

You knew that one!

“Mew!” you explained, leaping out from the speedster’s hands. With a few more delighted mews, you bounded over to the table, jumped to the top of it, and flipped open the hardcover book. You turned to the first page excitedly and began reading, oblivious to the numerous amount of humans amusedly watching you.

“Is it-is it reading?” Tony asked incredulously. “First it cooks, now it reads?”

“She’s very smart,” Pietro replied with a proud smile on his face.

“Meow,” you thanked absently, pushing forward the next page.

“Teaching kittens to read...didn’t think that merc had it in him,” Scott said, shaking his head. He was about to comment about the kitten’s state of fluff when heavy footsteps resonated through the room, signaling the arrival of someone on the stairs.

“Has anyone seen my book?” Loki demanded impatiently, glaring down at all the Avengers who turned up to look at him.  
“Is the one Fluffball is reading?” Tony questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Fluffball?” Clint inquired.

“Look at the kitty! It’s fluffy!” he cried.

“Fluffy, fluffy, fluffy,” Pietro cooed, patting your head as you paid little attention to him, fully immersed with the book, and your OTP as they interacted in such an OTP way. :3

Loki rolled his eyes and used what little magic he had to rip the book from your little paws and levitate it to his waiting hands. Unfortunately, thanks to your lightning fast reflexes, you wrapped your tiny body around the book before it zip away. Afterwards, however, you enjoyed your little ride.

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew!” you cheered, startling the god as he suddenly stopped the book, causing you to let go and fly to his face. “Meow?” you questioned, poking his sharply defined nose.

“Idiotic creature,” he hissed, trying to pry you off, which really just felt like tug-and-war, a game you never liked to lose. 

“Mew,” you challenged, thrusting away his pale hands. You then wriggled from your place on the front of his shirt and hid on the back of his neck. Marveling at his long black hair, you buried your furry body within, snuggling in its silky softness. It also smelled good.

“What is it doing?” Loki said, his voice beginning to sound desperate. His hands tried to firmly grasp you, but he ended up ripping out a little of your fur.

“Mew!” you whined, before accidentally releasing your grip on his hair and falling into his loose top. At the last second before free falling and landing on your head, you managed to grab onto his back. Bad new: your claws were extended and you ended up slicing him open.

“Ah!” the god yelled, more out of frustration than pain. You popped out of his shirt, unharmed, but was immediately distraught at seeing the blood on his back. No doubt you’ve clawed out your fair share of blood, but anytime it was an accident because you were trying to show affection, Wade never got made since he healed almost instantly.

As you watched, however, the man’s cuts didn’t immediately close, and you began to worry. “Mew?” you questioned, moving one step closer.

“Don’t touch me!” the Asgardian snarled, carefully attempting to observe his cuts. It was annoying enough that the most he could do with the magic Odin limited was conjure up one (ONE!) illusion, but now this cat had to humiliate him publicly about how he couldn’t even heal himself?

Loki growled as he stomped back up the stairs, ready to spend the rest of the entire wretched day in bed.

You blinked in confusion at his seemingly angry outburst, then turned to see that he left his book on the stairs. “Meow,” you decided, padding over to pick it up between your mouth. It was a bit heavy, but nothing your growing teeth couldn’t handle.

“Pisoi mic?” Pietro’s concerned voice called out. Looking up, you tilted your head at his conflicted expression. “Are-are you alright?”

“Mew,” you replied, your voice muffled by the book. Finally, you just spat it back on the ground and instead opted to push it up the stairs, a feat made more difficult the second the next step’s instantaneous height became known. 

While you took your time in both pushing and pulling Loki’s book up the stairs, Thor shook his head slightly. “I...think that Nick was right. She truly does not know the difference.”

“But I thought you said animals love unconditionally?...” Tony asked, confused.

“They do,” Clint assured. “Not knowing what hurts is just a minor downside to their cute little faces when you get home from work.”

“Sound likes you know what you’re talking about, old man,” Pietro scoffed, wondering if he should help you with the book, as currently, you were just on the third step.

“You got some dog we don’t know about, Hawkeye?” Bruce said dryly.

“Maybe.”  
~~~~~~  
“Infernal...Midgardian...creatures,” Loki cursed as he craned his head uncomfortably to see the wounds on his back. He’d discarded his shirt in its slightly bloody state in an effort to allow the scratches to breathe, but they still emanated pain.

Normally, things that would kill Midgardians wouldn’t even scratch him, so it was a mystery how that tiny animal’s claws were able to penetrate his skin. With a huff, he threw down his arms in defeat, not noticing the muffled knocks on his door until he heard a high-pitched mew go along with it.

Loki closed his eyes briefly before turning to flop onto his bed. As he laid there, staring at the vent above him, the meowing became persistent and gradually grew louder and louder. “Shut up!” he yelled.

It stopped.

“Finally,” he muttered, sitting up. The Asgardian sat like that for a second before reluctantly taking out the phone Tony insisted on giving him, no doubt to track his whereabouts every breathing seconds. He touched the little colorful square labeled, “YouTube,” and in pressing the little magnifying glass at the top right corner, typed in, “Treating Midgardian Animal Wounds.”

“The Dog Who Grew A New Face?” he muttered, confused due to the fact that this result was not at all what he was searching for.  
Suddenly, he heard a thump sound in the ceiling, and immediately he shot up, and opened a random app on his phone, hoping it would repel intruders. It made the sound of a camera as he took a picture of his own terrified face. “What the-?”

He fell backwards at the prospect of seeing his less-than-flattering visage, dropped his phone on his face, and bumped his head on his nightstand in the process. Loki groaned, rubbing his head.

“I hate Midgard.”

“Mew?” 

The Asgardian opened his eyes to see the same little, pathetic, fluffy creature that took his book sitting on his bed, shedding its unwanted fur all over. He blinked, then looked up to see the vent, now opened wide.

Looking back at you, he gave you a harsh sneer, turning towards the other direction with crossed arms. “Meow,” you complained, shaking the dust you got from the vent out of your fur. Once clean, you began to stare at the apparently pissed half-naked man. Or god.

“Mew,” you supplied, reaching out from behind you for the book.

“You are not welcome here. Go away,” Loki said in a low voice.

“Meow.” He heard a thump from something hard falling on the carpet, and craned his head curiously, thinking that your impact shouldn’t have been so hard.

The god blinked back in disbelief as his lovely book’s cover, unscathed, stared back up at him. He looked at the little kitten still on his bed, staring at him as well. After an elongated staring contest, he turned his gaze back at his novel. “Thank you,” he murmured.

“Mew,” you replied, spotting the angry red cuts still on his back. Your fur stood up on end, frightened on the amount of blood still present after a while. “Meow?”

Loki sighed, taking his book and flipping through it. “I can’t heal without my magic. So, similar to the primitive Midgardians, I must resort to “waiting it out.””

“Meow.”

He put his novel down to glare at you meaningfully. “No, I can’t.”

“Mew mew meow mew?”

“I’m a god!” he yelled, which, surprisingly, failed to startle you. Instead, you jumped from your place on the bed and onto his lap.

Looking up at him with big, shimmery eyes, you pointed at the ground. “Mew.”  
“You can’t tell me what to do, you dull creature, I’m a god!”

You rolled your eyes. “Meow. Mew mew meow mew mew, mew meow mew mew meow!”

The Asgardian let out a low growl, but did as you asked, allowing you to hop off his lap and then proceeded to lay down on his stomach. Once you were able to fully take in the nature of the wounds, you almost peed. It was really bloody.

“Meow,” you purred, nuzzling your head against the parts you assumed hurt the most. You knew that you would inevitably get blood on your head, but you didn’t like how this nice human couldn’t heal like you or Deadpool.

Loki let out a sharp breath as your fluff made contact with his broken skin. It was disappointing, really, how low he stooped. If you had told his former self that in the future, he would succumb to a kitten’s requests and cuddle with her, he would have laughed. The only reason he was doing it now was because it threatened to pee on his bed.

As moments went by, however, it seemed as if your nuzzling...was actually doing something.

“Meow,” you said, satisfied with your work. Loki first looked back at your adoring gaze, then felt his back. His emerald eyes grew wide at the seemingly invisible wounds. 

“What…”

“Mew,” you cooed, rubbing your bloody head against his chest.

Hesitantly, he ran his hand across your back, much to your purring contentment. You lifted your chin, hoping he’d catch your drift, and with less obvious reluctance, he did.

“Mew mew mew,” you said happily, wiggling around a little.

“You’re welcome,” Loki replied, allowing a small smile to take place on his face. It truly wasn’t his fault-truly. Animals as fluffy and adorable as you shouldn’t be allowed to wander Midgard freely without some sort of muzzle.

What had you done to him?


	7. You Meet Bucky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky hits you really hard, but that's okay   
> Loki makes you happy again :)

“Pisoi mic!”

The Asgardian jumped up from his place on the floor, knocking you to the ground in the process. “Mew?” you questioned, looking up at the man towering over you. For a second, Loki seemed to be conflicted with himself but when his door flew open, his expression became one of extreme hostility. You tried to hug his leg, but he shook you off harshly.

Shrinking back instinctively, you didn’t move the first time when Pietro kicked down the door. Upon seeing you on the floor, cowering under a threatening Asgardian, the speedster impulsively ran over and punched Loki, knocking him to the ground, and took you in his arms in the process.

“Oh, my kitty, are you alright?” Pietro cooed.

“Mew,” you half-whispered, attention still focused on the glaring god. You began to reach your paws towards him. “Mew! Mew!”

“The next time I see that abomination within five feet of me, I will literally pull out every single strand of hair on its body,” he hissed.

As Pietro gasped and covered your face with his hands, you peeked out through his fingers and pleadingly gazed at Loki, wondering what could have caused this reaction. You really wanted to show him how well you could roll around the ground and pretend you were a carrot…

“You are the abomination here, Reindeer Games!” Pietro said angrily, tucking you into his jacket. “Trying to kill little kitties!”

Your mouth dropped open to an O shape. He...he was trying to kill you??

Before you could have tea together?  
Why?

Loki felt a twinge of regret at the sight of you voluntarily hiding deeper into the delves of your owner’s jacket. He’d killed mortals and monsters alike, and animals just never seemed important enough for his personal attention. You, however….were just too innocent to spend time with the likes of a frost giant.

Before he could say anything else, the mutant zipped away, with the small mewling kitten hidden in his jacket. The Asgardian sighed heavily, and flopped back onto his bed.

~~~~~~

Baths usually made you happy. 

All the little bubbles you could play with, and the ducks! Quack quack!

But it didn’t this time. You were way too busy mewling about the fact that your new friend was trying to kill you! After you let him pet you!

“That man is very evil, pisoi mic,” Pietro said in a low voice, as he gently scrubbed your stomach. “You must stay away from him at all costs. That’s what the others told me!”

“Mew,” you grumbled, as the ducky you were playing with exploded.

“When you were climbing up the stairs,” the speedster explained, turning you over so he could get your back. “-I asked the other Avengers if that man was safe for my kitty to play with, and if he would heal from your wounds. But then Stark laughed and said that if he didn’t try to kill you, he would give up a hundred grand!”

“Mew!” you said excitedly, as another duck floated close to you. You tried to catch it with your paws, but the toy sank beneath the water, and when you tried to snatch it, your claws got caught on it, and it popped. 

“Pisoi mic?” Pietro said, pulling your attention away from the floating remnants of the two popped rubber ducks. “You’ll stay away from him, okay?”

“Mew!” you affirmed, nodding your head. A grin broke out onto his face, replacing the prior worried one, making you mew happily, because when your owner was happy, you were happy. That, and another floating ducky bumped into you.

“Meow!” you exclaimed, hugging the duck to your chest. You tried to put its head in your mouth, but it was too big. “Meow,” you complained, punching the duck’s head in an attempt to make him smaller.

Pietro laughed quietly as he lifted you from the sink and set you on the fluffy towel on the counter. “Oh, you are much too adorable, pisoi mic,” he chuckled, drying the top of your head.

“Mew,” you agreed, chewing on the duck’s beak.

“And very violent towards aquatic animals,” he noted.

~~~~~~

Pietro was very fun to play with. It was too bad he was so tired. You pulled the blanket over his head and patted him gently before jumping off of the bed. “Mew,” you whispered, and the vent door fell to the ground accordingly.

After the bath, the team was called in to SHIELD, saying they had to take care of a base that was being attacked by Doctor Doom. You dutifully took a nice, long nap as Pietro was gone, and woke up just as he arrived. By that time, you were full of energy, and wanted to have fun.

However, you could understand Pietro’s desire to sleep, as being a kitty, you took about ten naps a day. So, after kissing the speedster’s forehead with a little lick, you trekked into the vent.

You saw many different things on your journey, one of them being that guy that shoots arrows. He popped up from the entrance in front of you, panting, hugging a glass bottle to his chest. The man saw you, grinned, and crawled away in the other direction.

Finally, you smelled something interesting! You peeked through the holes of the vent door right below your paws and yelped in excitement at seeing someone down there. What caught your attention the most, though, was how long and pretty his hair was!

“MEW!” you exclaimed, your voice echoing through the vent.

Immediately, the man below threw a startling punch at the door, with an arm that seemed to be made of metal. He stared at the unhinged door in his hand for a second before trying to discreetly put it back where it came from. At first, it fell again, but that problem was fixed as soon as he concentrated on making the door balance on its own.

Breathing a sigh of relief, he turned around, only to stumble backwards and break down the door again. The Winter Soldier sat on the floor, breathing heavily, as a little fluffy kitten stared back at him with curious eyes.

“Mew?” it asked.

“....What?” he said breathily.

“Mew,” you inquired, stepping towards him. He tried to back away, but the door fell on top of him and almost hit you, if it weren’t for the fact that you caught it between your paws and threw it to the other side of the room. The man stayed still as you began to crawl over him, stopping at his chest.

You stood perfectly still for a second before pawing at his loose strands. “Mew,” you said, delighted.

At this moment in time, Tony was ravaging through the tower in an effort to find whoever took the last bottle of his favorite champagne. He had a feeling that it was Clint, and upon hearing noises in the training room, went to investigate. What he found, however, was anything but.

“OH MY GOD, STEVE!” the billionaire screamed, scaring your tail into poofing up. “THE CAT HYPNOTIZED THE WINTER SOLDIER!”

You watched as Tony left the room, then turned your head back to the apparently frightened assassin. “Mew,” you said.

“What do you want from me?” Bucky asked in a panicky voice. “I don’t have milk!”

In response, you poked his nose with your paw. “Mew.”

“GET OFF ME!” he suddenly yelled, slapping you to the floor with a harsh clang. It took only half a second for him to realize what he-or the Winter Soldier-had done.

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew, mew, mew, mew, mew, meeeeeeeeeeeee-”

“Shh, shh, please, please, I’m sorry,” he whispered, trying to find ways to soothe your despairing state, but failing miserably. “I...I didn’t…”

Bucky could only watch helplessly as you continued to cry, upset about how this person hit you when all you wanted to do was show him how well you could poke people in the nose. These people were mean!

“How-how about if I get you milk?” Bucky suggested, petting your head frantically as you continued to mewl loudly. “Will that make you feel better?”

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew, mew, mew, mew!”

“Use your words!” he cried, banging his head against the wall. “I don’t understand cats!”

“What in Midgard is happening in here?” a familiar voice snapped. Oh no.

You began to cry even louder, hoping someone nice would come in and take you away from these mean people. Bucky groaned internally, knowing for a fact that this particular Asgardian would not do anything useful for this particular situation. “Go away, Reindeer Games,” Bucky growled, rubbing your back.

Loki stopped in his tracks at the sight of you crying pitifully in the soldier’s arms. “What did you do, mortal?”

“Nothing!” he yelped, which only made you cry harder.

“I believe you,” Loki replied sarcastically.

“Okay, okay,” Bucky said, hugging you to his chest in an effort to muffle the sounds. “I...accidentally hit her.”

“You hit her?!” Loki exclaimed incredulously, his emerald eyes widening considerably. “And don’t push her face into your shirt like that, she’ll suffocate.”

“I said I was sorry!” Bucky exclaimed, rocking you back and forth desperately. “I just...I don’t know what to do!”

Loki knelt down next to him, his eyes fixed on your crying figure. Yes, he may regret this later, if Stark ends up watching the footage the security camera caught, but that doesn’t matter at this moment in time, for if he didn’t take care of this current problem, he will never be able to get to sleep with the thought of a sad little kitty embedded in his mind.

Letting you claw him in an effort to keep him away, Loki gently took you in his hands and scratched your cheek, instinctively convincing you to calm down a little. He then placed you at his heart and began to dig through his back pocket. The Asgardian rifled through until his hand took ahold of the sweet he stole from Thor.

It was one of his favorites back on Asgard, when he was a child, and while he intended on eating it in front of Thor, seeing as it was the last one he had, it could also be used to calm you further. He had no idea if it was poisonous to you or not, but if you could eat that monstrosity mortals claim as food, it was probably safe.

Loki held the soft-looking candy in front of your nose, and you shot out a bit of your tongue to taste it in curiosity. Once you got a full sense of the deliciousness stemming from the candy, you opened your mouth wide and took it all.

It tasted delicious!

“Mew,” you cooed, rubbing your head against the god’s chest. 

“How did you…” Bucky trailed off.

“Not a word,” Loki muttered, but even he couldn’t help the small lift at the corner of his mouth as you mewed happily at him. 

As you chewed, you thought about what Pietro said about staying away from Loki, because he could kill you. The truth was, anybody could go on and kill you. You were just a silly little kitten, after all. And he did pet you really well…

Oh! That reminded you! 

You patted Loki’s chest to get his attention, meowed once for assurance, then hopped off his chest and proceeded to roll around the ground like a carrot.

“Aww,” Bucky whispered. “It’s so fluffy.”

Loki hummed in agreement, a full-on grin smearing his normally stoic face. “Indeed she is.”


	8. You Almost Burn Your Tail

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bucky and Loki tried to feed you.  
> It doesn't end well.

“Meow, meow, meow,” you said cheerfully, as you continued to roll around like a carrot. This was fun!

“She’s so playful,” Bucky murmured.

“I can fix that,” Loki replied, with a growing grin. He pulled out a small clip from the back of his pocket and pulled you over.

“Mew?” you asked, tilting your head. Loki scratched your cheek comfortingly, causing a distraction for you as the Asgardian carefully put the pin on the back of your neck. After making sure it wasn’t clamping on you too hard, he let go.

Immediately, you felt a sense of calm. Like, the kind of calm you felt whenever a butterfly landed on your nose. You didn’t want to move.

Bucky gasped, hesitantly reaching out a finger to poke your unmoving figure. Steve told him stories about the god next to him, about how he had done even worse things that Bucky had as the Winter Soldier, but even then, he had some trouble believing that he actually killed the kitten.

“She’s not dead,” Loki explained, reading his mind. “It’s called clipnosis.” He took off the clip, and instantly, you jumped back up. Spotting the interesting object in Loki’s hand, you began to jump up after it, only to mew in disappointment when he lifted it up at the last second. “The spot where I placed the clip is the same spot where mother cats hold their kittens,” he continued, moving his hand as he talked, causing you to chase after it.

“So...she wasn’t hurt?” Bucky asked skeptically.

Loki shook his head. “Not at all. What that was was simply a kitten’s natural instinct to stay still whenever that point is held.”

“So, you just killed her for a second,” the super soldier concluded.

“I would have used the word paralyzed.”

“Mew!” you cheered triumphantly, as you finally managed to swipe the clip from Loki’s hand. You laid it on the ground and acutely observed it, poking it a few times, sniffing it. “Meow,” you commented.

“She’s so cute,” Bucky cooed.

Eventually, you decided that the clip wasn’t worth playing with, and melted it with your laser eyes. Bucky’s finger, on its way to tickle your tummy, froze in midair.

Silence took hold of the air as you waited for the heat behind your eyes to cool down. Once they did, you looked up at Bucky with an inquisitive tilt. “Mew?”

“Now when did you get that ability, little one?” Loki chuckled, picking you up.

“I’m scared,” Bucky whispered. 

“Meow, mew mew mew!”

“She does not intend on using it on you just yet,” Loki translated. “But she will if you hit her again.”

“It was an accident!”

“Mew. Meow mew mew, meow meow mew!”

“She says that she will forgive you if you cook her food. Pietro made her promise that she won’t use the stove again. She’s very hungry. ”

~~~~~~

“How in heck does this thing work??” 

“I don’t know, but what I do know is that the food itself should not be black!”

You rolled your eyes, watching the two men try to use the pan. In short, they were hopeless. 

Before, you were thinking that if Bucky and Loki were able to cook decent food, you might have been able to forgive them for hurting you physically and emotionally. Now, they made the pain by cooking the sorriest looking fish filet you’ve ever seen.

“How do you turn off the stove?” Bucky cried.

“I, Loki, of Asgard, command you to turn off, inferior Midgardian fire-producer!” Loki ordered.

“It’s called a stove, Reindeer Games,” Bucky snarled, before the fire caught onto his shirt. “Oh! Hot!”

“Your clothing is on fire,” Loki informed him.

“Mew,” you agreed.

“Whose side are you on?” Bucky yelled, trying desperately to fan out the flames. Instead, he ended up allowing the flames to catch onto Loki’s shirt. 

“Look at what you have done!” Loki growled, opting instead to take off his shirt. Unfortunately, the fire from that article of clothing reached his pants. “NO!”

You watched interestedly as your two friends ran around the kitchen, cursing and screaming about how “cheap and unusable Midgard clothing turned out to be.” To be honest, it looked kind of fun.

Oh! You got an idea!

Flopping up, you ran over to the stove and carefully placed your tail on top of the fire, waiting for the flames to lick it up. This never happened, sadly, because right before it could, someone snatched you and pulled you far away.

“Meow,” you said, a little upset.

“I swear, Pietro,” Wanda muttered, using her powers to douse the two screaming men while she turned off the stove herself. “If you can’t take care of one kitten…”

“Meow mew mew mew mew meow,” you told her.

She sighed, stroking the top of your head. “I can read your mind, but I cannot speak your language.”

“Mew.”

“She said that Pietro is fast asleep,” Loki mustered, before beginning his struggle up the stairs, no doubt to replace his charred pants.

“Meow,” you affirmed, before hearing a loud rumbling sound coming from your stomach. You poked your tummy, uncomfortable with how it was sounding. “Mrrr…”

“Here,” an out-of-breath Bucky said, holding out the pan with the charred remains of the fish sitting inside. You looked at the fish, then up at the super soldier, who was smiling hopefully.

Tentatively, you ripped out a piece of the black abomination and slowly lifted it to your mouth, trying not to gag. It seemed to take forever, as with each bite, the fish tasted worse and worse, but you were eventually able to swallow it all. “Mew,” you thanked hoarsely.

“I think she likes it,” Bucky said, his smile growing slightly.

“The pisoi mic has a very high tolerance for eating garbage,” Wanda guessed, handing you over to the super soldier. “Keep a close eye on her,” she told him, walking away.

“Wait, wait, what?” Bucky asked, panicking. 

“Meow,” you said, poking his arm. Once you got his attention, you pointed to your tummy, signaling that you were still hungry.

“Uh…” Bucky began to look around the kitchen, not wanting to repeat the stove experience. “Ah!”

He walked over to the fridge, took a broccoli from the bottom shelf and held it out to you. 

You melted it with your laser eyes.

“Wow, okay,” he muttered, thanking the universe that it was his metal hand you lasered, not his real one. The super soldier opened cupboards, racking his brain for what he knew about cat food. Would you eat cheese? Or eggs?

“I got it!” he said suddenly, almost dropping you. Bucky set you down on the counter and patted your head. “I’ll be back, I’m just gonna go ask Steve if we can go to the grocery store, and I’ll get you food, okay?”

“Mew?” you asked, confused considering that the kitchen was stocked with all the yummies you could ever eat. You just needed someone to get them. You watched as he left, the kitchen door swinging behind him. “Mew,” you said sadly.

A few moments later, which seemed like an eternity to your kitty brain, the door swung open again, and you sat up in anticipation. Loki walked through, observing the mess in distaste. “Where did the soldier go?”

“Mew mew meow mew meow,” you supplied.

“Ah,” he nodded, continuing to look around. You watched him for a minute, but then remembered about your growling tummy.

“Mew!” you called out.

Loki’s head snapped to attention, furrowing his dark brows at your request. “I suppose you do not wish for me to use the stove.”

In response, you melted the stove with your laser eyes.

Loki stared at the melting remains for a second before scratching your cheek affectionately. “We’ll blame this on Thor.”

“Mew.”

“Alright then, tiny Midgardian kitten, what do you wish to eat?” he asked, still scratching your cheek.

“Mmmmm, mew mew mew mew meow meow, mew mew mew meow mew.”

The Asgardian nodded in agreement. “Indeed. It is not healthy to eat too much of something.”

You suddenly perked up. “Mew, mew meow mew mew meow mew meow?”

Sighing, Loki rubbed your growling tummy apologetically. “No, I’m sorry, little one. I don’t have any more.”

You wiggled in his gentle grasp desperately. “Mew meow mew mew meow mew mew??”

Looking around in the cupboards, Loki hummed in concentration. “Would you like some canned tuna?”

“Mew mew mew mew mew mew? Meow mew mew meow?”

“Hmm, no, you don’t seem like a cave-cat. What about…” Loki took out a can and squinted at it. “Gravy?”

You melted the can with your laser eyes.

“That’s a no,” he noted, fanning his nearly-burned hand in an effort to cool it down. “What is it that I can feed you, then?”

“Pop-Tarts, perhaps?” another voice boomed from the entrance. Loki sighed, annoyed, before continuing to rifle through the cupboard. You, however, turned around to see a man with the hammer that you picked up the other day.

“Mew!” you greeted, jumping down from Loki’s shoulder. You missed the look of disbelief on Loki’s face as you bounded over happily to the thunder god. Mostly you were happy because of the delicious smell emanating from the food in his hand. “Meow?”

Thor laughed heartily. “Yes, my hair is naturally blonde!” he misinterpreted.

Loki rolled his eyes, still facing the cupboard. “She asked what is it that you were eating. Idiot.”

The Asgardian ignored the second part of his brother’s statement and crouched down to your level. “This is a Pop-Tart, little one,” he said, holding it out in front of you. 

“Mew,” you said, fascinated.

“Here, try some,” Thor suggested, breaking off a large chunk and handing it to you.

The green-clad demigod shook his head before finally turning around. “She’s not going to-”

“Mew mew mew!” you said, happily chewing on your food.

Thor chuckled, rubbing your fluffy head. “She seems to like it, brother!”

“I am not your brother,” Loki growled, storming out of the room.

You looked up just as the door closed, and blinked in confusion. “Mew?” you questioned, abandoning your Pop-Tart to take a few steps toward the door. “Mew mew?” you called out, getting a little upset. “Mew mew mew meow?”


	9. You Grow Way Big

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe you should just stay away from cookies...

“What’s the matter, little one?” Thor questioned, completely confused.

“Mew!” you shouted, trying to run after the god that just left. Unfortunately, you didn’t bother to be careful, so the glass door shattered as you ran right through. Poor Thor was left staring at the shards and hoping that you liked him well enough to not do that to him.

“Meow meow!” you called out in relief, at the sight of your Asgardian friend still nearby. Loki looked back quickly, only to find his gaze averted by a slight tugging on his leg, which happened to be you. “Mew?” you asked, patting his feet.

He scowled. “Go away.”

“Mew!” you said defiantly.

Loki rolled his eyes and tried to shake you off, but you only dug your claws through his pants, and onto his skin. When you assured your grip, you began to climb up his legs, ignoring Loki’s rigorous attempts at throwing you to the other side of the room.

“Meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew,” you whined, when he accidentally pulled on your tail. This caused you to slide back down his legs, ripping his pants as you went.

The god’s scowl deepened when he saw the obvious rips on his clothes. “Well done,” he said sarcastically.

As he walked away, you sat on the ground and shook your head, trying to recover from your fall. When you looked up to see your friend gone, you began to mewl, covering your head with your hands. You didn’t understand what you did wrong!

Okay, okay, you thought, rubbing your kitty cheeks. What was the last thing you did? Hmm, you were looking for food, you kept destroying the foods you hated, and then the blonde man who ate your chimichanga offered you a Pop-Tart.

Oh! That was why! Loki probably wanted a Pop-Tart too, but got mad after you ate the rest of it! Of course! All you had to do was offer him another Pop-Tart, and he would like you again!

~~~~~~

As it turns out, Loki did not like Pop-Tarts.

You stared at the door that was your only way to Loki, slammed shut at the sight of you with a brand new Pop-Tart pack. “Mew,” you said sadly, picking the Pop-Tart up and dragging it back down the stairs. 

As you stepped into the living room, the door burst open, with a panicking Bucky running through. “I’m back!” he exclaimed, releasing his hold on the numerous amounts of grocery bags he previously held. The super soldier took several deep breaths, a bit worn out after running three miles to the nearest Wal-Mart carrying a few dozen pounds of grocery.

“Mew?” you questioned, poking through a little box that fell from one of the bags. Eventually, a hole appeared, and the contents began to flow out in groups, which seemed to be little red fish crackers. You leaned closer to sniff it, but immediately recoiled. “Mew!” you whined.

Bucky, on the other hand, was smiling as if he won the lottery. “Oil, fat, tuna, grape, alcohol, caffeine, chocolate, egg, and carb free. Perfect for a growing cat!”

You hissed at him, then began to knock your head against the side of his leg, intending to irritate him. Bucky took it as a sign of affection and grinned widely. “You’re welcome,” he cooed, crouching down to rub the top of your head.

“Mew,” you grumbled, but you continued to allow him to pet you. 

“Now,” Bucky said, jumping back up. “It’s dinner time!”

He picked up the cat food the pet store owner recommended, and began to look for you, but was confused to suddenly find you nowhere in sight. “Kitty?” he called out, swiveling his head side to side.

“Mew!” you exclaimed, delighted to find that you could turn invisible. You ran off toward the stairs, intending to hide in Pietro’s room until he woke up so you could have some proper food. 

“Where are you?” Bucky questioned, scratching the back of his neck. Suddenly, his hairs stood up on end as a familiar laser sound resonated through the room. Immediately, he jumped, and when he recovered, the super soldier was dumbfounded to see all of the groceries he bought with Steve turned into a pile of blackened ash. 

“...Mew,” he muttered.

~~~~~~

As you walked to your owner’s room, you wondered if this day could possibly get any worse. First, you weren’t allowed to make your own chimichangas, second, Loki is mad at you for some reason, third, Bucky bought you a bunch of food that obviously won’t help you, and fourth, you were still very hungry!

Sighing, you pushed open Pietro’s door and walked in, just as the speedster woke. “Pisoi mic!” he cried, obviously happy to see you. You jumped into his inviting arms willingly, still silently pondering about what could possibly help you understand people a bit more.

“Is something wrong?” Pietro asked, a bit worried considering that you haven’t mewed or anything. He rubbed your stomach soothingly in an attempt to gain a response.

“Are you hungry?” he tried, poking your nose. “Do you want me to make you something?”

“Mew,” you replied glumly, hiding your face in your paws.

“Hmm…” the speedster tapped his chin, deep in thought. Suddenly, he snapped his fingers, startling you just a bit. “Oh, I know! Pisoi mic, would you like to help me bake some cookies with a recipe my Mama showed me and Wanda when we were little?”

“Mew mew?” you said excitedly, temporarily forgetting about your little problems. Pietro nodded eagerly, then, after tucking you safely in his jacket, zipped down the stairs to the kitchen.

~~~~~~

“Why would she need that?” Bucky snapped, turning the formula over repeatedly with his metal hand.

Scott rolled his eyes. “Beats me. Tony made me give the materials.”

Tony let out a harsh breath. “It’s necessary! Come on, guys! Nobody is supposed to stay that cute for so long without making a deal with some demon!”

“I am much older,” Thor stated, munching on a Pop-Tart.

“It’s creepy!” the billionaire cried. “Her-her eyes draw you in, you know, like how a sale on hot sauce does? And then it turns out to be a nightmare when you least expect it! With age does not come innocence! I’d feel better if that-that animal wasn’t a cute, fluffy, little kitten! And this cookie will fix that!”

“How does a sale on hot sauce turn out to be a nightmare when you least expect it?” Bucky muttered.

“Where did this fear of the Fluffball come from, Tony?” Scott asked.

Tony took a deep breath before flopping on the couch with a serious look on his face. At that moment, the door opened to reveal Sam and Nat stepping into the room.

“It started with a dream,” Tony began, and immediately, the two SHIELD agents turned around to exit. Scott himself began to leave, but the billionaire pulled him on the seat next to him without making any extra movement. “Well, not really a dream, more of a daydream, if you will.”

“Hello, everyone!” Pietro chirped, zooming into the room. “We are going to make cookies!”

“OH MY GOD IT’S THE DEMON CAT!” Tony screeched, jumping behind the couch. He flipped open a drawer, which turned out to contain dozens of water balloons. The billionaire held one up, poised to attack.

“Cookies!” Thor cheered, getting up to follow the speedster. 

“Mew,” you said, eyeing the water balloons.

“I’ll, uh, go too!” Scott announced, abandoning the package he brought from the lab.

“She’s gonna kill you guys!” Tony insisted, leaning over to grab the package Scott left. “Hey, kitty, you want some-”

“We’re not feeding your experimental cookies on her, Stark,” Bucky growled. “No way.”

“Just a little? OW!”

“Mew,” you commented.

~~~~~~  
Le Time Skip Brought To You By Pietro’s Shoe Brand  
~~~~~~

“THOR! WHAT THE HECK?”

The thunder god turned to face the super soldier currently donning a red and white checkered apron, a matching hat on his head, with a murderous expression that didn’t exactly go with it. He blinked. “Is something the matter, Brother Barnes?”

Bucky threw his spatula to the sink, startling everyone in the kitchen. “You’re not supposed to eat all of the batter! The directions clearly state-”

“How did he even manage to gulp that down?” Scott asked in amazement. “I those that was a recipe for cats!”

“It is,” the soldier growled, ripping off his apron. “I found it in the store. They said it was healthy.”

Pietro groaned loudly, rolling his blue orbs. “Healthy? Try disgusting!”

“If you want your pisoi mic to live, then this is probably your best choice,” Bucky answered lowly.

“But it does not make her happy!” the speedster cried. “She liked the smell of my mama’s cookies and wanted to try them! I do not understand why you had to throw them away”

“The kitten was able to eat the chimichanga,” Scott noted. “That takes a lot of stomach for a little kitty. And isn’t she magical?”

“Do you really want to risk it?” Bucky snarked, taking off his oven mitts.

Pietro sighed. “I suppose...my pisoi mic should be eating healthy.”

“Hey...speaking of which,” Scott said slowly, turning around on himself. “Where is pisoi mic?”

“Pisoi mic?” the speedster called out, lifting upside down pans to see if you were underneath. “Where are you?!”

“Mew!” you exclaimed from the living room.

“No no, you gotta eat all of it,” they heard Tony state in a muffled voice.

“Oh my god,” Bucky growled, shoving aside the broken door to see you, on the table, munching on that evil snack Tony had Scott make, while the Stark himself hid behind the couch, grinning madly and rubbing his hands together. “Tony!”

“Just a sec, Terminator,” Tony whispered, watching you munch happily on the yummy cookies. “I’m waiting for the effect.”

“WAIT FOR THIS EFFECT, YOU FREAKING-”

“OW! That hurt! No, not the face. THE FACE!”

You watched, interested, as you wiped away the crumbs that had gathered at your chin. It was really funny how they Pietro, Bucky, and the man that gave you the cookie gathered up in one big pile. It was exciting...until Bucky started hurting the one that gave you nice food. “Mew!” you said, hopping off the table.

About to stop them, you suddenly crumpled at feeling your stomach...not feeling so good. “Mew,” you groaned, hugging your tummy in hopes that someone will notice. The ground seemed to be farther and farther with each second. That probably wasn’t good.

“MEW!” you yelled, and that’s when the boys began to notice you. Their eyes grew wide, their argument forgotten, as their attention focused on your rapidly growing body, but not in the maturing degree, no. You were just growing, and growing, and growing…

When your head collided with the ceiling, you leaned on your side in order to not break it. However, as you did so, you broke the wall-to-wall windows and fell through it.

“Pisoi mic!” Pietro yelled, rushing towards the broken glass. The speedster skidded to a stop as he saw you lift your head, your figure nearly the size of the tower. And you weren’t done.

“Mew!” you whined, trying to avoid the little cars that kept hitting your feet. You stood up on your hind legs to avoid them, but that just made you off balance.

“OH MY GOD!” Tony screeched, bracing himself for the inevitable wall of fur about crash his living room.

“Mew!” you yelped, feeling your paw land on something sharp. Thrashing around, you were desperate to find the source of the owie. It didn’t break the fluff of your fur, but it hurted. A LOT.

“STOP MOVING!” Bucky yelled, but immediately, he regretted it. You turned around with big, shimmery, sad eyes, and a quivering mouth. “No...no, no, I’m sorry-”

“MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-”

The unbroken windows in the tower shattered at the high-pitched tone of your cries. Covering his ears, Scott said sarcastically, “Way to go, Barnes! Now New York’s having a nine point nine earthquake!”

“You made her cry!” Pietro shouted, over your mewls. “I’m going to kill you!”

You heard that statement, and even though Bucky did yell at you, he was your friend, too. But Pietro was your friend, too! He wanted to make you cookies! He was your best friend! Your little kitty mind couldn’t deal with that kind of stress, so you simply continued to cry.

“MEW, MEW MEW, MEW, MEW!”

“WHAT DID I SAY?” Tony said, his voice at the top of his lungs. “DEMON CAT!”

“NOT A DEMON!” Pietro attempted to lunge at the billionaire, but the tower suddenly shook vigorously, as if someone was trying to release their pent-up aggression, similar to how someone would use a punching bag. Which was exactly what you were trying to do.

“NOT TO FEAR, FRIENDS!” Thor boomed, his voice somehow louder than your kitty cries. “I WILL SOOTHE THE FLUFFY MIDGARDIAN ANIMAL THAT IS NO LONGER THE SIZE OF A POP-TART!”

The thunder god flew outside, and hovered directly in front of your twitching nose. “I MEAN NO HARM, KITTEN OF THE SILVER-HAIRED ONE! I SIMPLY WISH TO KNOW WHAT IT IS THAT YOU ARE CONCERNED ABOUT!”

“MEW!” you snapped, slapping Thor up in the sky, where he flew higher and higher until the speck that was him disappeared.

“...Apologize, Barnes!” Scott hissed.

“I’m sorry!” Bucky called out in an unusually high voice.

“Mew,” you said, still a little miffed that Thor left before you could ask him to pet you or scratch your cheeks. Nevertheless, you accepted the super soldier’s apology before moving to sit down.

“NO, DON’T SIT!” he yelled, startling you into crushing a poor statue under your kitty tail.

“MEW!” you exclaimed, feeling the owie on your skin embed itself more firmly as you sat. Immediately, you stood up, but that only seemed to make the pain a thousand times worse.

“What was in that cookie? Huh, Stark?” Pietro stormed towards the billionaire, ringing his neck with no mercy. “IS IT SOMETHING YOU WANT ME TO FEED TO YOU?”

“Pietro, calm down!” Scott tried to say, but could only watch helplessly as the speedster choked the engineer, his mind coming to the conclusion that Tony probably deserved it. “Tony just wanted to see if the growing Pym Particles could make a cat grow up, so he asked me if he could use a little bit of the suit’s to try it out!”

“I AM LITERALLY GOING TO KILL YOU!” Pietro screeched.”KITTENS ARE ADORABLE!”

“Mew!” you said, poking your paw into the building to try to get someone’s attention. You were still hurt, and you still couldn’t find the source of the owie. It hurted a lot. “Mew mew meow?” you called out, getting more and more shaky by the minute. You didn’t want to bother Pietro, as he seemed to be busy, but the owie was really starting to hurt!

“Are you okay, kitty?” Bucky called out, squinting to see what you were trying to get. “Are you hurt?”

“Mew,” you said, but he didn’t understand. “MEW!” you exclaimed out of frustration, causing all of the nearby building’s windows to shatter as well. 

“Okay, okay, just...just calm down, okay?” Bucky tried to soothe, but seeing as he himself sometimes couldn’t control the instincts of the Winter Soldier, he wondered if he was really the person who should be calming you down.

He looked towards the others, who were busy either trying to kill another, trying not to be killed, or trying to calm the others down. Taking a deep breath, the super soldier turned back to you with uncertainty tainting his blue eyes.

You were staring at him with big, sparkly orbs that seem to resonate your innocent confusion. At this, Bucky exhaled sharply with a determined glint in his eyes. He was not going to let you down.

“Twinkle twinkle little star,” he sang in a gentle voice, patting your nose in a similar manner. “How I wonder what you are. Up above the world so high-”

“Mew!” you exclaimed, recognizing the song. The super soldier sighed in relief, then continued in his singing. 

“-like a diamond in the sky. Twinkle twinkle little star, how I wonder what you are,” Bucky slowed to a stop as you began to purr, making the building rumble, but not necessarily with the same ferocity it did when you cried. He rubbed your cheeks for a second before asking, “Are you still hungry?”

“Mew,” you affirmed, content in Bucky’s scratching.

The super soldier scratched you a bit harder before heading towards the kitchen quickly. Your head followed him, and you mewed. A few moments later, he came back, a milk jug in his hands. 

“Mew!” you cheered.

“Don’t drink too much, now,” he warned, and you nodded eagerly. Bucky unscrewed the cap and carefully placed it in your mouth, causing you to gulp excitedly.

“Not too fast,” he said, and you slowed down.

The other men’s argument had ceased quite a while ago, when the Winter Soldier began to sing, in fact. Tony meant to take a video, but by the time he found his phone in the mess, he dropped it in watching the kitten shrink before his eyes.

Suddenly, the vent door from directly above him fell to the ground, causing Tony to shriek and jump into Pietro’s arms, at which the speedster’s response was to let go.

Clint jumped down from the vent, and in spotting the giant hole where the windows should be, scratched his head confusedly.

“Did you guys redecorate without me?”

~~~~~~

“So, again, could you explain what happened?” Natasha asked, her brows still creased in obvious disbelief.

Bucky sighed deeply, contented with watching you repeatedly poke his metal arm to see if it will do something. “The kitten grew gigantic.”

“Yeah, no, the hole told us that,” Bruce said.

“How did it happen?” Wanda asked, pointing her gaze threateningly at her brother, who held up his hands in innocence. 

“It was not me! I wanted to make cookies for my pisoi mic, but then Scott and Thor went to join me! And then pisoi mic grew because someone decided to put Pym Particles in Bucky’s cookies, which my pisoi mic ate!”

“That can’t be, though,” Scott said slowly. “Bucky’s cookies were still baking when the kitten ate the cookies. Are you sure, Tony?”

“Yes! I know I put them in Bucky’s because his was the batter with broccoli in it!” the billionaire cried.

“Wait, wait, wait, if that was just a regular cookie, then why did she grow so big?” Clint questioned.

“...An allergic reaction?” Steve suggested.

Pietro laughed a bit crazily. “There-there’s no way-”

You sneezed. And promptly began to float.


	10. You Hug Loki Better

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kitties

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: SO...this was your first week with the Avengers! I decided to make another ficcie where you get to see all of kitty's daily adventures with her new friends! And maybe some plot advancing, too! (Oh, and you can request adventures for our kitty to experience. You're welcome)   
> Read if you want!  
> Kitty would love it!

“Wow…”

“What?” Pietro asked, suddenly appearing next to Banner as his eye was focused on a microscope, his fingers working at the dials. “What did you find?”

“Her DNA is...to say the least, incredibly unique,” the scientist marveled, lifting his head to watch you with interest as you poked a blueberry bag with caution on the counter.

“Mew,” you growled, kicking a blueberry that popped out of the bag threateningly. 

After the floating incident, in which everyone hid behind the couch while you floated around and Tony tried to catch you with a butterfly net, Bruce took you to the lab to conduct a few experiments, on Wanda’s suggestion.

“To protect her from any more things she may be allergic to,” she said pointedly, with her gaze focused on her brother, who was more than a little reluctant to let go of you after your allergic reaction went down. 

“What do you mean, unique?” Pietro questioned, plucking the blueberry you previously kicked and were currently to stalking and threw it into his mouth. You felt betrayed. That blueberry was supposed to be your next victim.

“Her genes...Well…” Bruce seemed to be struggling with the words. “They seem to be completely natural, no mutations or enhancements added.”

“How would you know that?” Bucky asked from behind. Both men jumped, forgetting about the silent assassin who had followed them into the lab.

Bruce let out a long breath and placed his hand on the microscope he was using. “Tony made this. It was specifically for identifying what genes made up unnatural ones, like the gamma radiation in my blood.”

“Or the super soldier serum in mine,” Bucky reasoned.

Bruce nodded. “That’s about right. According to it, the last mutation added was, well, when she was born, so it doesn’t really count. Afterwards, her genes just kept on acquiring new traits.”

“That’s so cool!” Pietro gushed, crushing you in his arms.

“Mew!” You couldn’t breathe, and began to struggle profusely.

~~~~~~

This situation…

It was ridiculous.

Never had he ever thought in all of his years prior to this that he would be this...upset…

Over a Midgardian creature. An extremely hairy, extremely noisy, extremely large-eyed Midgardian creature.

It was utterly humiliating. No, not humiliating, because obviously this situation is literally nothing more than an annoyance. Not even that. Just an inconvenience along the way.

Why was it a convenience, you ask?

BECAUSE IT WAS EATING AWAY AT THE VERY FIBER OF HIS BEING.

Yes, you heard it. A stupid god admitted he wanted the stupid attention of a stupid animal.

Of course, even when you grew to astounding heights and broke the windows of his room with your tail, you still couldn’t bother say hello to him. You were too busy crying over something that hurt in your foot. So selfish.

In the beginning, after you accepted food from Thor of all people, when he, decided that you weren’t worth his time, he wanted to just stay cooped up in his room, sit on his bed, and think about his pathetic life. For a god, of course. If he was mortal, his life would be fantastic.

For Norn’s sake….who was he kidding? He was practically a mortal now, what with the amount of magic he was limited to. Mere parlor tricks. An illusion of a rose would be very helpful in times of need.

If he had shredded his dignity the moment he stepped into the tower in chains, he most likely would admit that perhaps his solution to punish you for accepting food from the thundering of that ruined his life was a bit too much, and ineffective besides.

So deep was he in his contemplation of his own pathetic nature that he didn’t notice the vent directly above his head begin to move, and only noticed anything in the outside world when the vent crashed down on him.

“What in...NORNS!” he exclaimed, throwing the vent door to the other side of the room.

“Mew!” he heard, and immediately froze in his tracks.

You sat at the foot of his bed, staring at him with gigantic eyes, and after a few seconds, you tilted your head curiously. “Mew?”

The Asgardian blinked hard. “Get out,” he snapped.

You continued to stare at him.

“Get out!” he said louder.

“Mew,” you replied.

There was a quiet staring contest. You kind of hated these kinds of games because you were supposed to stay still for a really, really long time, and you didn’t like staying still for a really really long time, but you were determined to find out why your second best friend was so mad at you.

Finally, Loki broke your gaze and thumped down on his bed. “Mew?” you asked, leaping up in the air to land on his chest.

“Get off,” he grumbled, but he made no visible effort to push you away.

“Mew,” you cooed, hiding your big head in his neck.

Hesitantly, the god began to rub your back, but in less than five seconds, he was all over you, hugging you to his chest like how a child holds their favorite toy. You were dying, but that was okay.  
He was okay, too.

 

 

BECAUSE KITTENS WERE MEANT TO TAKE OVER THE LIVES OF ANYONE THAT TOUCHES THEM


End file.
